There are several places you can pick up the forms applicable to your state - hospitals & clinics, online or at courthouses. The forms should be free.
I am making this my priority for 2012. I am going to have my big sister, my nieces Natasha and Gabrielle as my primary agents. My secondary agents are going to be my nephews Jean-Paul and Andre (both extremely pragmatic men) and my best friend Jone. (One of my best friends already told me that they would be too emotional to accept along with the fact that she is 20 years older than me and not in great health herself.You might run into your agent choices refusing & that's okay.) I am going to be talking with my chosen agents in the next few weeks after I do a dry run through the forms. My two nieces are out of state, so I will be taking care of one's part when she visits and another's long distance. Not going to be easy conversations, but...
The form that I picked up is already very specific and detailed, but I am going to make sure that my agents truly understand what I want done in case I get too sick to make decisions (like THAT doesn't happen sometimes already!). You can add additional pages to explain or further outline certain details you might want to include. By the way, urge your family and other loved ones to get their L.W./A.D. done. I am going to make sure my sister signs hers that we already started. One of my nieces just had a baby & she is talking about getting her and her spouses Will and Testament in order, so I am sure they are going to have L.W.s done. The birth of a child, New Years', birthdays and other milestones are a great time to remind people.
For years, I have been urged to do this by doctors when I go in for checkups and such. For years, I have let forms sit and become dusty, unsigned and, eventually, tossed out. That's dangerous. My current physician reminded me that I could run into serious medical problems as the result of something as common as a bad cold. Flu will hospitalize me and pneumonia could kill me. He didn't pull any punches when he handed me a L.W. packet at my last visit. His advice? "I care about you as a patient and the nice person you are, but if you can't speak for yourself, do you want me or your family to be making a decision about whether you are treated a certain way?"
Good point, Nuff said.
Without a Living Will, you could end up having important decisions left in the hands of doctors, the State, or people who don't always understand you or your full wishes.
Choose your "agents" (decision makers) carefully. They should be only people who:
Understand what you really want (this will be spelled out in the forms)
Respect you personally while you are well and not in need of a Living Will (this is very important)
Love you unconditionally (also important), and
Will not cause problems for the other agents
The love and respect are important just because you are bestowing a grave and serious honor on these agents, They should be people who deserve your trust in taking care of your medical wishes. You don't want someone with a half-step attitude toward you!
Also, if you are asked, you should not accept to be someone's agent unless you can emotionally handle the responsibility, It's too much of an important situation.
If you need somewhere to start, here are some resources:
- AARP state-by-state advance directives
- You might be able to pick up free packets at your doctor's office, the hospital or clinic. My clinic has free packets for the asking. Check with the courthouse also.
- Wikipedia explanation of the L.W.
- Legacy Writer (supposed to be free. Check the privacy statement & any disclaimers)
Bottom line, you can find information fairly easily to help in getting this life-helping decision out of the way.
Good luck.
Peace
--Free
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