Sunday, November 03, 2013

5 Annoying Habits of Certain Websites

Sometimes I think of websites as having personalities, like potential friends who'd be perfect but for that one little thing... Of course, we don't exclude people from our lives because of a couple of flaws (because people, people need people), but we do get to bitch about it:

  1. You are attached at the hip to that person I really just cannot stand. This is from those sites that still refuse to let you choose whether or not you want to Facebook. I would like to erase the presence of Facebook from my life. Really, I would, but on a couple of sites (hi there, She Speaks and Bzz Agent) insist that if I want to get full benefit of their time, I'd better have a FB account. It's not gonna happen. Too bad that I might miss out scoring as many points as the subscriber who is still in love with FB. Just. Too. Bad.
  2. You ignore the new kid on the block - just because they are different. Even though G+ is a way more varied and grown-up network, some of you sites just have not clued in yet. G+ is that funky new sound that hasn't been watered down enough for heavy airplay. I guess.
  3. You won't let me come over and play with you unless I agree to swap blood with you. Ick. I'm talking about you, Zulilly's. I don't know why you think I'd want to agree to give you my contact information just to get to know you. I mean, what if I don't like you after I glance around your house? 
  4. You are that freaking embarrassing and loud-assed friend who starts shouting the minute I walk up to you. There are too many sites guilty of blasting audio-ads or entertainment news the second the page loads. I damn near got kicked out of the library once because I forgot to shut off the volume and treated the whole fourth third floor of Loussac to a shrieking ad for freaking "Poo-pourri." I was just trying to read a news article. Talk about needing poop deodorant. Pretty near shit myself.
  5. You are that friend who whips out a slideshow for every story about your kid, your dog, your job... I mean, I am interested in what you have to say, but do you have do do it one picture at a time? (Take a cue from Cracked. I don't care what you think of me for being in love with They at least give you the choice between "article view" or torture by a slow connection.)
The number 5 looked best in the title of this post, but I have another peeve with one (or two?) of my favorite sites of all: Twitter and YouTube. If you try to tweet a video from YouTube, you get that irritating stalker box trying to force you to "Follow" a couple of their accounts. I can't remember which ones because I Followed both just to get rid of the irritation! Damn. (I just tweeted "I Can't Make You Love Me" to vent at them. Because I'm so mature.)