Not P.C. Just Real

Well. I finally got my lazy ass to an eyeglass place and got my specs. Kind of scary riding with my friend once I could see just how bad she drives. I'd forgotten. This is a woman who has severe road rage issues. She also has an obsession about two other things: smoking and her hair. One time she tossed a cigarette out the car window and when it blew back in on her hair, she damn near killed herself swatting at the cherry. But she has pretty good taste so I let her pick out my frames.

So, I started out wanting to make this a post about observations on race and the recent U.S. election. I have several, and in thinking over them, I realized what a conflicted person I am:

• I hate Romney and am not thrilled with Obama. I'm registered Independent. Was going to write in  Grace Jones. Romney fucked up and praised Arizona's healthcare system. I should have asked my doctors about their opinions on the issue.
• I feel bad for Romney. (Still despise the man, but...) Seems like he was treated pretty shabbily after the loss. On one hand, I wonder how the hell his protection was just cut off so immediately; on the other hand, he can afford his own security. (One of my BFF's says that if he is smart, he had backup security from the git-go. Doesn't seem like the pros have been taking their jobs as seriously as they take their partying ways.)
• Can't understand how anyone votes for a specific party. Are we voting issues or people? Race or America? 
• Really pissed at the dumbasses doing stupid shit because Obama won. I get that some people don't like the man or his policies - or even his race. Do they get that some people felt the same way about other presidents and still managed not to be assholes about it? I was living in England when Reagan was president. Lord knows I had problems with that man, but you know what? Just like I don't talk about family out of the house, I didn't talk about my president. (I didn't defend him or anything, though. I respected the office if not the man. And guess what? I still felt my heart swell and my eyes fill with water when I heard the U.S. National Anthem played.)
• I've heard an interesting arguments about voting "race" in the election:

 A white man asked his black friend, “Are you voting for Barack Obama just because he’s black? The black man responded by saying, “Why not? In this country men are pulled over every day just because they’re black; passed over for promotions just because they’re black; considered to be criminals just because they’re black; and there are going to be thousands of you who won’t be voting for him just because he’s black! However, you do not seem to have a problem with that! This country was built on the sweat and whip of the black slaves’ back, and now a descendant of those same slaves has a chance to lead the same country, where we weren’t even considered to be HUMANS but rather property, where we weren’t allowed to be educated, drink from the same fountains, eat in the same restaurants, or even vote. So yes! I’m going to vote for him! But it’s not just because he’s black, but because he is hope, he is change, and he now allows me to understand when my grandson says that he wants to be president when he grows up, it is not a fairy tale but a short term goal. He now sees, understands and knows that he can achieve withstand and do anything, just because he’s black.".....

Why does it seem that we have evolved in so many ways yet stood frozen in time in other ways? I've read too many reports of ignorance from those against Obama - but none that discuss specific reasons against a black president. (Okay, I've seen one report discussing/not discussing it.) Here's some of the ignorance:

From Teens on Twitter... To college students... People who surprised me a little... Those who surprised me not at all... To, well, these morons (l love the first comment! My family is from the south.)

A kid thinking... An actor (the "message didn't mean anything"? Really, Sam? Damn)... And the randomness.

~sigh~ What a world this is.

 Okay. Enough seriousness. Now for the silliness! (And, yes, I realize some of you may be offended. Look, I've learned to laugh at a LOT of things.)

This is what I wanted in '08 til Bill pissed me off

Kind of arrogant, but so was Romney telling the Prez to sit down (during 1st debate)
Crow is so fucking hard to chew.

The best post-election tweet?

(And this, people, is a JOKE. Just a joke.)

A little boy was watching his mother in the kitchen making a chocolate cake from scratch. 

While the mother had her head turned, the little boy went to the table dipped both hands in the chocolate frosting and covered his face with it.

The mother turned around to see what the boy was doing. She screamed:  "Boy, what the hell are you doing?"

The son gleefully replied, "Look Mama! I'm black!!!" 

The mother became enraged and slapped the crap out of her son. She then said "Boy, go show your father what you’ve done!"

The boy then walked into the den where his father was reading and said "Look Daddy! I'm black!!" 

The father put his magazine down with a very puzzled look on his face (seeing the chocolate on the boy's face.) 

The father said "Come here, boy!" 

The boy came to him and the father smacked his son across his head. 

The father angrily said "Now go show your grandpa what you've done!!!" 

The boy then slowly walked to his grandpa who was on the porch.

He said: "Um... Grandpa, Look what I did.  I'm black now..."

The grandfather said gruffly, "COME HERE BOY!" 

The grandfather took the boy over his knee and proceeded to spank him. 

"That'll teach you! Now go back in the kitchen with your mama!!!"

The boy walks back in the kitchen and the mother said, "I hope you've learned your lesson, young man!" 

The boy says with a scowl on his face, "Hell yeah! I've been black for 5 minutes and I HATE you white folks already!"

Now, being serious again: think about the different ways that all hope for a better world really do belong to our children - if we teach them right. There should be an awareness that we all have to live here on this planet together. I want my nieces and nephews to not have a need to be tolerant because they will just naturally accept others as fellow human beings.

Peace (really)

--Free

Them, They, Us

Now that I have told you about my "friend," I feel free to tell you about a conversation he, D and I had a few weeks ago. (We do this weird thing when Rick's in town where we call D to discuss life, politics and, of course, my book - which is coming along slowwwly.) It was a discussion that almost turned into a heated debated, but ended up being a learning experience.

The topic: Race and the media (or race in the media).

My friend (I will call him "Rick") was talking about some news article. He got all heated because it's his feeling that the media generally slants toward negative racial stereotypes. He is Indian (think Eastern not Native American) and has the brain of a researcher and the soul of a civil rights activist. (I do have such interesting people in my life.) D is multi-racial (black and asian/black).

Rick was so upset that I got a little uncomfortable. I mean, I know about the ignorance of racism. I've been a guilty party (when I was younger, dumber and hotter-tempered) and a victim (at times, not as often as could be). Luckily, my skin is pretty thick and my brain is sometimes slow to absorb. When I am in the presence of the extreme stupidity of a bigot, I either blow it off or (and this is a plus side to my medical issues) I miss that shit entirely. Sometimes, I am an hour past the situation before I go, "Oh! Huh? Aw, hell no, they didn't!!!" (LOL) Most of the time, I just don't let it rain on my mental joy parade. Age brings mellow.

That's me. Rick, though, doesn't let too much fly past him. He doesn't look for stuff to get pissed about, but he has a kind of radar for it.

In the conversation we had, I tried to cool it all out by telling him about an Indian comedian I recently heard. The comic said he wins the "rough life" struggle hands down over black people. "You grew up in the "hood?" I grew up in the Third World. You had rats and roaches in your home? I did too and we called it dinner. You had hand-me-down shoes? I made those shoes!"

Thank goodness that Rick didn't think I was being insensitive in repeating the joke. He didn't, but it didn't cool things out much. (D, however, thought that was the funniest shit he'd ever heard and for the rest of the conversation, he'd break out into insane giggles at inappropriate moments.)

Nothing is going to chill Brother Malcom X Ghandi, but he did agree with me on one point. (Thank goodness I had a very clear and coherent few minutes at just the right time.) Here is my whole stance:

Until we all get past the whole "Them, They and Us" mentality, there won't be much understanding. We are somehow infected with the idea of separating ourselves by race, class, gender, likes, dislikes, size of hands, feet, etc. I think it's just such a human thing to compare. (I am almost sure this happens about two seconds after we leave the womb and breathe air.)  It's fine to distinguish  or identify ourselves, but anytime we start comparing - something or someone or some group is going to feel superior or inferior. Since we can't change that mentality, we have to learn to respect (or disrespect) each other as individuals and not as groups. (One day, I'm going to be able to go into Walmart and not cringe with personal shame when I see some black woman popping and rolling her neck as she screams across three aisles for her bad-ass child to "get back over here NOW!" Yeah, I said it.)

I'm really happy to say that Rick gave me a high five on that one. I respect and value his opinion because where I have common sense, he has tons of "book smarts." (You all know I love my geeks, right? Well, he is to Geekdom what Adonis is to hotness. Helps that he's pretty damn hot himself.)

Anyway, even D was able to control his manic giggling long enough to say that I'd given him something to think about. I wish he'd have thought about how his girlish laughter made it hard to keep my train of thought.

Of course, we didn't solve any major world crisis, but we all feel better about the subject. (And if Rick keeps it up, I'm going to make him a freaking red, green and black flag even though I have explained to him that I am a black American and not African-American. Hell, Charlize Theron is more African-American than I am, but that is a whole other discussion...)

Whatever, I hope that one day, we can all just learn to be a little less racially-affiliated and a whole lot more human. That's really the only race that matters to me. Yes, call me Pollyanna & see if I care.

Peace
--Free