I'm Finally Doing This...

~Folks, I am going to be losing some weight because I am having these 'toofies' of mine taken care of!~

For a long while now, I have been having dental problems. In general, I started having bone problems a while before my Sarcoidosis diagnosis. I cracked a rib sneezing once and didn't think much about it. I was told that it does happen. Once I was diagnosed. my doctors scheduled regular bone density scans - I think it was every other year at first, but I will be having one soon after a three-year lag.

I always told people that my bone and teeth issues were from one of the medicines I take. I was completely wrong. The bone problems are from the sarcoidosis. Aside from every other horrible thing about this disease, it causes bone loss. 

My dental issues started over a year after the diagnosis. I cracked a front tooth and had to have a crown put in. The dentist mentioned the bone loss in my jaw and said I would have to think about doing something about it at some point. At the time, all my other teeth seemed okay. Fast forward to about 4 years ago and, yeah, the problem got worse.

At first, my canines were just a little loose. Then some of the teeth on the side got weak. I was at a family barbecue and when I took a bit of meat, I felt one of my bottom side teeth shift and when I released the meat the tooth lifted up a bit. Good Lord! 

I slowly started losing teeth until I couldn't even smile at people without wanting to cringe. When I finally saw a dentist, the skies opened and I heard harps. My insurance would cover everything - removals and replacements. I was thrilled for 2 days. Then I got the call that this particular dentist wouldn't be able to treat me because of my sarcoidosis. He worked in a community clinic and was concerned about liability.

That was 2 years ago. I felt like I was being punished or something. Some other people were going to the clinic and having their dental work done. A neighbor of mine had her extractions and dentures done within a few weeks.

I wasn't being punished, I was being blessed. Had I been treated by that first dentist, I might be doing what my neighbor is doing: not wearing her dentures and complaining about the work that was done in her mouth. 

As I have learned to do in my older age, I prayed about the situation. I found another dentist but they were a few hours away and I didn't feel good about the practice. Then, one day, my little brother noticed a dental office right down the street from where I live. The practice is well-spoken of around town and the staff was lovely. The dentist is a young dude (I joke that "he's ten!") and happens to be a Christian.

On Wednesday, I'm having all of my upper teeth removed.  We are doing things in stages so I have time to heal after each appointment.

I am anxious, excited, nervous, and happy. Thanks to my family, I don't have to worry about anything my insurance doesn't cover. When I tell people I'm blessed, they think I'm just saying it, the way people say "Have a nice day". When I say I'm blessed, I'm giving my testimony. 

I will end this now and try to come back to update you on the process.

Peace

--Free

When I Buy a Blanket

So.... now that I am here (you know, the place that I call M.M. - "Mayberry of the Midwest"), I am kind of falling in love with the area. Just like in any relationship, I don't want to fall too hard too fast, but...

The waterfall behind an old mill house

From a walk through the neighborhood

Love the trees that are everywhere

...And I mean everywhere!

And then I found THIS at the store. Yum.

A walnut. Yes. From a tree in my family's yard.

About 7 bucks for this humongous fish sammich

Just a sight I had to photograph as we went on a drive

Not every place is right for every person (no-brainer, right?), but every place is right for some person(s). From the minute I saw the landscape below from the window of the plane, I started having feelings for what I was seeing. Good feelings, calm feelings, hopeful feelings.

So far, I've seen soybean fields, cornfields, animal pastures... I even saw deer playing in a park.

My first full night here, I think I had the best sleep that I've had in years. And I only slept in bits and pieces. I kept waking up to go and sit out in the fresh air and sounds of a peaceful night. I listened to a stillness that I haven't been in the company of for a long time. I had little chats with God. I even had a little chat with a squirrel that was playing in a nearby tree. (Actually, I only chatted with him after my heart quit hammering. The little booger was playing so furiously in the tree that I imagined some big and scary thing was about to drop down on my head!)

This morning, I introduced myself to the cadence of the town - which cycles from slow, deep breathing to that which is slower and more shallow; I met and struck up acquaintances with  some of the streets and sights. I learned that not much is open before 7am. (Last night I figured out from the sudden silence that not much is open or moving after 8pm.)

Today, my brain is still tired and trying to adjust to the time and calm. I thought that my body was bone-tired, but I realized a few minutes ago that it's just trying to re-calibrate from too much stress to this feeling of being detoxed. It's very weird.

Because I've had my hopes dashed before - more than 'dashed', maybe more like soaked and beaten against rocks like so much dirty laundry - I'm cautious with my expectations. When I'm ready to accept that this really might be the place for me, I'll go and buy coffeepot. Maybe I'll even buy a plant.

I'll know that I'm ready to settle in when I go and buy a blanket. Right now, I'm working on just breathing.

Peace
--Free