The Randomness

A friend brought to my attention that I haven't been posting consistently for the last month or so. As if I don't know this without being told. So here are my latest thoughts and rants:

Moving took a ton out of me. My lack of energy sometimes astounds me. There's days where I have to trick myself into getting out of bed. I'll tell myself that if I don't get up, I will be missing something vital that life outside my bedroom has to offer. I got a gift cert from one of my girls and I got some beautiful wall art with it. Haven't hung up a thing yet. The art I got is sitting in a corner of the living room. I have some more, smaller pieces on layway & it can stay there until I feel like risking my life on the step stool. I've been beating hell out of myself for being such a slug, but now the fam has jumped on that wagon. "You only need the energy to get up, that will get you going." Or, as one of my friends said the other day, "Half of getting something done is just wanting to." Really? What's the other half - a magic wand?

Yeah.

Or my sister or one of the brothers will call up and make me feel guilty. "Yes, you're sick, but I'm going to come kick your ass if you don't get up and move." (Or they'll play the Mama card: "Mama would want you to be stronger than this." You do know that black people and Jewish people are true brothers and sisters, don't you? No one can play the guilt game better.) I've actually started lying. When certain numbers pop up on Caller ID, I can sound like I'm running a marathon - while I'm actually half in a sleep-coma.

Anyway.

So, even though I feel like crap (whine, whine, whine), I am up today and actually checking off a list of things to be done: laundry, post on blog, laundry, clean the bathroom, laundry, take out something for dinner, laundry, pick up prescriptions, laundry, finish D.J.'s video in time for his birthday, laundry, make my calls to the out-of-state aunties, laundry...

I really do need to do something about my life.

A friend of mine who travels in and out of town, and who is a little more than a friend but a little less than a lover, thinks I need to go away somewhere. Yeah. He has a job and things like credit cards and disposable income. My food stamps just got shut down - all $19 freaking dollars. Whoops! No more extravagant food purchases for me. Gonna have to live without that fresh spinach that I love...

Okay. I'm done with the whining. On to the good stuff:

I am getting back into reading my Bible. I used to be good about studying and praying on the Gospel, then I got sick and fell into my pity-pot. Something my 12-year old nephew said made me feel ashamed and just knocked chased me to my knees in prayer: "I love you, Auntie Roo. I'm so glad you didn't die when you were in the hospital. I prayed for you."

That made me cry with gratitude and shame. I don't want him to know that I was in danger of dying, but to my little nephew, I am old. Old and close to death! LOL. Funny/not funny. I love that little dude.

The truth is, even though I didn't die, maybe, as my mother used to say, God was trying to tell me something. Maybe I need to learn to listen for His voice. Yesterday, I watched a video called The Daniel Project. Good stuff, if you like Bible prophecy. Good stuff if you need motivation dust off your Bible.

Anyway, I apologize for such an unorganized post. I swear I think that sometimes I only post because typing at 70wpm is something I can still do and feel good about.

Peace
--Free

Random Morning Music

Have fallen in love with a couple of songs. (Not new, but new to me.) Enjoy.

her voice is nice

their energy if fun

IT STARTED WITH A WHISPER!

Most things do.

Peace

--Free

The Sexiest

People came out with there (I mean, their) famous Sexiest Man list. They did ai'ight, but... Here's mine:



Denzel is just... Denzel. What can I say?

I don't even need to explain this. Mm, mm, mm!

****

Mr. Hutchence just had the most beautiful eyes. And he could sing his butt off. And he had this way of looking at people... I imagine he was one of those guys who could've looked me right into some serious trouble.

R.I.P. you beautiful soul

1. ****

~sigh~ Oh, Leon. I could just kiss the lips off your chocolate-y goodness.

The hotness going on here... Whoo! Can somebody get a sister a fan? 

Slim Shady, baby.

"Mercy, Mercy me."

Billy Dee. Old School hotness.

R.I.P. Pac

No words. Just. No. Words.

And my Number One: that sweet, kind-eyed Keanu.

Mine, ladies - All mine

I swear I just felt my heart quiver. 

Here - let's take another look...

Lord, just one moment to look in his eyes.

I know that some of you (younger ones) are probably wondering why I have a few guys on the list who aren't here with us anymore. Doen't matter. It's not as if I (or you) have a chance, so we can dream.

The thing is, this isn't just about sexiness, but about what makes someone sexy. Not looks, money or power - even though there a prez and a bunch of rich guys here. Sexy is not ever about who you are, but what you are. For me, it's in the eyes, the smile or the kindness. I love compassionate and engaging men. If you're a guy and you want to be sexy, learn from the best.

Peace

--Free

Fashion To Die For

I went shopping a few weeks ago for shoes and boots. I have two pairs of boots that I can wear right now. Keep in mind that this is Alaska, it is winter, and I have Sarc. I have balance issues. Walking, I'm like that sad old chick leaving the club after that one drink too many. Yeah.

There was a time when I could walk downhill on an icy sidewalk in 4-inch heels and never even quit swinging my ass. I fucked around the other day and damn near broke my neck getting out of my nephew's truck. In flat-soled boots. Times, they have-a changed on me.

Anyway, like I was saying, I've been scouting some new footwear. It hasn't been going well. They don't just design shoes anymore - footwear these days is like art conceived by Satan's minions.

This is the standard heel type I saw in one store:



Cute shoe, but that's not a heel, it's a potential weapon - with me as the victim. Do you understand how many ways I could hurt myself just trying to stand still in that bitch?

This heel is more my speed.



If I wanted to look like a schoolmarm with a side job doing the hoe-stroll.

Are you starting to see why I still only have two pairs of trotters?

On to the boots...

I really like this pair that I found online. Cute and I could walk my tail off in them.



My injury was caused when I saw the $100+ tag. Unless they are going to be doing the laundry and dishes, these have no place in my home.

Okay.

And that's just footwear. Obviously, the fashion revolution wasn't televised (or I forgot to set the DVR). When the hell did clothing become so complicated?



I guess finding cute rags was easier when I was rocking those sizes 4 through 8. I really like this grey sleeve dress, but if I wore this out in public now, I'd get arrested or blind somebody. There isn't a pair of Spanx made to help me out with this one.

I might have hit on something with this one:



Great colors; loose enough to disguise things that need to be. I just can't justify the $60. I can get something similar at Burlington's for $19.99. The only problem is, finding a decent boot.

You know? Screw it. I'm going to just go with something my big brother taught me a long time ago: bring the focus back to the best. That used to be my legs, but I think now I better go find some really good lipstick and figure out how to line my eyes without jabbing myself.

Oh snap. I just saw that dashikis have made a little comeback.



$14.99? It's about to get real up in my closet.

Peace
--Free

Not P.C. Just Real

Well. I finally got my lazy ass to an eyeglass place and got my specs. Kind of scary riding with my friend once I could see just how bad she drives. I'd forgotten. This is a woman who has severe road rage issues. She also has an obsession about two other things: smoking and her hair. One time she tossed a cigarette out the car window and when it blew back in on her hair, she damn near killed herself swatting at the cherry. But she has pretty good taste so I let her pick out my frames.

So, I started out wanting to make this a post about observations on race and the recent U.S. election. I have several, and in thinking over them, I realized what a conflicted person I am:

• I hate Romney and am not thrilled with Obama. I'm registered Independent. Was going to write in  Grace Jones. Romney fucked up and praised Arizona's healthcare system. I should have asked my doctors about their opinions on the issue.
• I feel bad for Romney. (Still despise the man, but...) Seems like he was treated pretty shabbily after the loss. On one hand, I wonder how the hell his protection was just cut off so immediately; on the other hand, he can afford his own security. (One of my BFF's says that if he is smart, he had backup security from the git-go. Doesn't seem like the pros have been taking their jobs as seriously as they take their partying ways.)
• Can't understand how anyone votes for a specific party. Are we voting issues or people? Race or America? 
• Really pissed at the dumbasses doing stupid shit because Obama won. I get that some people don't like the man or his policies - or even his race. Do they get that some people felt the same way about other presidents and still managed not to be assholes about it? I was living in England when Reagan was president. Lord knows I had problems with that man, but you know what? Just like I don't talk about family out of the house, I didn't talk about my president. (I didn't defend him or anything, though. I respected the office if not the man. And guess what? I still felt my heart swell and my eyes fill with water when I heard the U.S. National Anthem played.)
• I've heard an interesting arguments about voting "race" in the election:

 A white man asked his black friend, “Are you voting for Barack Obama just because he’s black? The black man responded by saying, “Why not? In this country men are pulled over every day just because they’re black; passed over for promotions just because they’re black; considered to be criminals just because they’re black; and there are going to be thousands of you who won’t be voting for him just because he’s black! However, you do not seem to have a problem with that! This country was built on the sweat and whip of the black slaves’ back, and now a descendant of those same slaves has a chance to lead the same country, where we weren’t even considered to be HUMANS but rather property, where we weren’t allowed to be educated, drink from the same fountains, eat in the same restaurants, or even vote. So yes! I’m going to vote for him! But it’s not just because he’s black, but because he is hope, he is change, and he now allows me to understand when my grandson says that he wants to be president when he grows up, it is not a fairy tale but a short term goal. He now sees, understands and knows that he can achieve withstand and do anything, just because he’s black.".....

Why does it seem that we have evolved in so many ways yet stood frozen in time in other ways? I've read too many reports of ignorance from those against Obama - but none that discuss specific reasons against a black president. (Okay, I've seen one report discussing/not discussing it.) Here's some of the ignorance:

From Teens on Twitter... To college students... People who surprised me a little... Those who surprised me not at all... To, well, these morons (l love the first comment! My family is from the south.)

A kid thinking... An actor (the "message didn't mean anything"? Really, Sam? Damn)... And the randomness.

~sigh~ What a world this is.

 Okay. Enough seriousness. Now for the silliness! (And, yes, I realize some of you may be offended. Look, I've learned to laugh at a LOT of things.)

This is what I wanted in '08 til Bill pissed me off

Kind of arrogant, but so was Romney telling the Prez to sit down (during 1st debate)
Crow is so fucking hard to chew.

The best post-election tweet?

(And this, people, is a JOKE. Just a joke.)

A little boy was watching his mother in the kitchen making a chocolate cake from scratch. 

While the mother had her head turned, the little boy went to the table dipped both hands in the chocolate frosting and covered his face with it.

The mother turned around to see what the boy was doing. She screamed:  "Boy, what the hell are you doing?"

The son gleefully replied, "Look Mama! I'm black!!!" 

The mother became enraged and slapped the crap out of her son. She then said "Boy, go show your father what you’ve done!"

The boy then walked into the den where his father was reading and said "Look Daddy! I'm black!!" 

The father put his magazine down with a very puzzled look on his face (seeing the chocolate on the boy's face.) 

The father said "Come here, boy!" 

The boy came to him and the father smacked his son across his head. 

The father angrily said "Now go show your grandpa what you've done!!!" 

The boy then slowly walked to his grandpa who was on the porch.

He said: "Um... Grandpa, Look what I did.  I'm black now..."

The grandfather said gruffly, "COME HERE BOY!" 

The grandfather took the boy over his knee and proceeded to spank him. 

"That'll teach you! Now go back in the kitchen with your mama!!!"

The boy walks back in the kitchen and the mother said, "I hope you've learned your lesson, young man!" 

The boy says with a scowl on his face, "Hell yeah! I've been black for 5 minutes and I HATE you white folks already!"

Now, being serious again: think about the different ways that all hope for a better world really do belong to our children - if we teach them right. There should be an awareness that we all have to live here on this planet together. I want my nieces and nephews to not have a need to be tolerant because they will just naturally accept others as fellow human beings.

Peace (really)

--Free

For Ladies Only

I do reviews every now and then about products I am familiar with. The products I want post about today are for the ladies...

Problem: Personal freshness.

Solution: Panty Fresheners

Poise is known for their "wetness protection"  products, but I recently discovered something that most any women would be interested in: Poise Panty Fresheners. Most of us use sprays, douches, wipes, etc., but the "fresheners" are a nice addition to our arsenal! LOL ...The Fresheners are small round pads (about the size of a half-dollar coin) and thinner than a pantyliner. They come in a discreet screw-top case that can be tucked into a pocket or purse. Pull one out, remove peel & stick to outside of panty. The scent is mild and nice. (Side Note: Is is my Sarc or does spell-check really not recognize "panty" as a word???)

Problem: Serious personal freshness

Solution: Deo Candy Perfume 

This is a product of these guys. You eat the candy which infuses your body with sweetness the way garlic will infuse you with a sense of loneliness. You can see where to buy it here. Me? I dunno. I told a friend about it and her response was, "Why not just eat Secret?"

Problem: Finding Makeup for the differently complexioned

Soltuion: Several on-line/in-store locations...

Most over-the-counter makeup is not for those out of the range of common skin tones. This is only a big deal to me personally on a few occasions - like when I want to take photos or (now that I'm dating again) am going out somewhere with someone special, or when I'm having a really effed up hair day & want to draw attention elsewhere. At those times, I really want the right kind of makeup. I'm dark with red/yellow undertones. I have friends of all races who don't quite fit the standard Peach-to-Cocoa line of store products. That's tough. By the way, most makeup for darker women are for blue undertones. I go to cosmetic counters a couple times a year for 1) a decent lipstick/stain/gloss and 2) a comfortable foundation that doesn't make me look like I am wearing makeup. I run into the peach/pink or plum/orange-red crap and leave the store feeling like, "Can a sista get a break here?" Unless you are Beyonce/Halle or Naomi, finding OTC makeup for black women is a challenge and I know my sisters of other misters - white, Latina, Asian, etc - have the same problems. We've all heard of Black Opal, Mary Kay, Fashion Fair and Flori Roberts. Here a couple more places to check out (and don't let the ethnic names fool you; the there are a wide range of shades at each site):

• Becca - for women of any race/skin tone. They will even blend a shade for you. Use the contact form to send specific skin-tone info and a photo of yourself for help in discovering what's best for you.
• http://vasanticosmetics.com/ - they seem to have a nice range of blends and shades for women of Caucasian skin tones. Not a lot of versatility for foundations & eye products. I include them because of the lipsticks and skin care they offer.
• Black Radiance - not for me since they do the Plum lipcolor thing instead of a decent brick red - but the eyeshadows & foundations look really nice. (I have contacted them asking if they do samples.)
• blackUp - a French company with amazing colors. Foundations and other shades will work for anyone of a darker-beige shade to dark. The lips shades run from basic to funky. Check out the out of stock Forever Matte Gold or It Girl colors... Umm, umm, crazy. 
• Zhen Beauty - makeup for Asian skintones. People of different ethnic persuasions have the same undertones as Asians. The lipshades are nice, and they offer custom compacts for the mix-and-match fanatics. I just love that. (I know my Asian sisters feel me when I complain about the super-ethnic sounding names of the cosmetic sellers!)
• Iman Cosmetics - I like the whole "find your shade" option here. I won't add anything else about the site. I cringe as I add it here simply because I once met this woman and she was thoroughly unpleasant. (And, okay, I didn't meet her as in "for lunch and cocktails," but as part of a queue of folks when she did an appearance at a large mall. Let me tell you, beauty does not always make for a lovely personality!)

Anyway, there you go, ladies. Enjoy and I hope this helps when you do that next hunt for the perfect lipstick or foundation. Remember: the way you act shows your real beauty (or lack of). Go out and be as beautiful as you can.

Peace

--Free

(P.S., ladies - Fashion Fair has a nice range of lipsticks. I like the Femme Fatale color in the Siren Call line!)

Smoke and Snow

Winding up my first day on Chantix. Done with my first month of it really being winter. Hopefully, come spring, I will be smokefree, extra-pounds free and, please, oerish please, my Lord in Heaven, sweater-and-coat free!

I am making my New Year's wishes (not resolutions) early:

• To be back to work before the end of 2013
• To have mended any broken relationships
• To cherish each moment that I am healthy & Sarc-free
• To build on all the new friendships I am being blessed with everyday
• To live every moment as if it is my last: taking chances, risking ego for joy

Those are the things I am working on. For today & quite a few tomorrows (God willing), I am going to finish whipping this apartment into shape.

Peace
--Free

Sunday Randomness

Stayed up until 4:00 this morning (except it was really 3:00 because of time change) and was up at 8:00.

Ugh.

Feel half-stoned on fatigue, but wanted to post so... randomness:

• My skin's been addicted to Bio Oil for years. I currently have 5 1/2 bottles of the stuff. Why? Because with my Sarc (I guess), every time I go to the store, I forget that I have some at home. At least it's cheaper at Sam's Club, but comes with a large and a small bottle. Damn. Lot of oil.
• My fridge is full of fruit, Vanilla Soy milk, Vanilla Caramel coffee creamer and Fage yogurt. I'm trying to eat lighter now that one of the docs stepped down my prednisone. I am kind of ick of fruit at the moment.
• Pissed at myself for watching hours of "Beverly Hills Nannies" last night. That was a sloppy mess, but roomie and I laughed until we ached. Lack of sleep makes me silly.
• Feel stupid for watching hours of scary crap like "Paranormal Witness." (Not so stupid that I'm taking it off my Hulu "Favorites" list...)
• Filched some of the roomie's perfume because of the cute bottle. That's some nice smelling fragrance & I'll be damned if I can't read the smeared label. Going to have to 'fess up so I can get some of my own.
• Why did I never notice until a few days ago how absolutely smoking hot Eminem is? He seems very serious though.
• Laughing my ass off at this video & not wanting to offend anyone for their voting choices: 

                                                                                       C'mon, admit it, that's just funny, no matter how you vote. (By the way: DO go vote!)

• My roomie drives me crazy, not rinsing and putting her dishes in the dishwasher. We are incompatible as far as the "neat factor," but I love her like a sister. (If I didn't, I'd smother her in her sleep.)
• The nephew D.J. is learning to walk with his little push-toy. He's still to learn that wood floors are trickier than carpet for those strolls of his. Still missing the kid.
• Intrigued, fascinated, mesmerized by the Gwen & the band here:

The bass player is just killing it.

Okay. It's obvious that I am tired, so I'm going to stop the madness, make like I'm five years old and take a nap.

Peace

--Free

P.S.: For the voters out there, this is interesting, but please don't ask why I still read "Cracked."