Friday, November 20, 2009

Things You Don't Wanna Buy From A Dollar Store

One thing I love about being Stateside: the variety of shopping venues. Here in the Dallas-Ft. Worth area, you can shop high-priced, mid-priced, low-priced or (and this is where my budget sits right now) dirt-cheap-priced.

In Anchorage we have so-called "Dollar Stores," but nothing is ever really a dollar. More like $2.50 and up (and not worth half that). Here in Ft. Worth, there are stores that sell things priced at a buck. My fave place? The .99 cent place.

If you know me, you know that I just about lose my mind when I go into this store. ZThis is where I get my shampoo, face wash, toothpaste, Crunch and Munch... All that vitally necessary stuff, right?

But.

There are just some things that you should not buy at a store hawking .99 cent prices, okay?

Last night, my cousin and I dropped by the store so I could pick up some various little items I needed. I mean, I am kind of in limbo right now - visiting here while I get ready to relocate.

So.

We go on and do our little aisle-cruising thing. I get my combs and lotion and what-not, then I hit the aisle with the toothpaste and toothbrushes so I can be done and outta there.

While I am trying to decide whether I want to get a single toothbrush, a two-pack, or a set with a dental pick and tongue brush, my cousin is scoping nearby products. She's checking out some cocoa butter cream and other stuff when I hear her blurt out, "Aw, h_ll no!!!"

Now, when my cousin says something like this, I usually go alert to see if she has spotted someone wearing something inappropriate or looking really broke down. (Don't forget, we did spot the 500-pound lady wearing "Daisy Dukes" in a store...) This time it wasn't somebody but something.

Condoms.

Lubricated condoms, non-lubricated condoms... Condoms in a variety of colors...

Condoms? In the .99 Cent Store? Really? No-freaking-way.

My cousin almost hurt herself getting out her phone and taking a video of this mess. (We figured, without evidence, who was going to believe us.)

Now - is it just us, or does that seem wrong somehow? Selling (or buying) condoms at the .99 Cent Store?

My cousin was like, "What do they do - give away free pregnancy test kits with a box of the condoms?"

That was funny to us until we went to check out and teased the clerk about it. He was dead serious when he told us that they also sell the pregnancy test kits. He also told us that people come in and buy the condoms four and five boxes at a time. (I guess so because who would trust wearing just ONE of them at a time?)

"That's it for me," my cousin said. "That's just it. I am DONE."

*smh*

Peace
--Free

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Breathing Again

Six days since I left the hubby & I am learning to breathe deeply again.

When you see the worst side of someone you were in love with, it's such a shock that you block it out and go blind to the negatives. Then, when you do open your eyes and let yourself see... Well, all that ugliness just slams you. You see things so clear that it hurts to do so.

Some truths: The man I loved does not exist. That man was a facade. The real man came out when things didn't go his way. I can't have a relationship with a memory or a ghost & I want nothing to do with the real man. I fell in love with someone I remembered from 30 years ago. I don't even know if those memories were correct. I was blinded by past wishes and dreams.

Now I am learning to relax and see with clear eyes again.

Three years of something like sleepwalking through the days... It's a little overwhelming now that I am "free" and starting fresh.

In 2006, I posted about having found "new love" with an old boyfriend. These days I am writing (on paper) about all that has happened. It feels almost as if all this has happened to someone else, not me.

For now, I am in refuge with my fam. Just soaking up the love and comfort that only family can give when you've been battered by things going on in your life. Next month, it's all new beginnings: new town, new place to live, new people, new opportunities... Come January, it truly will be a "New Year" for me!

In the meantime, I am reconnecting with old friends on Facebook. People I had not heard from all the time I was in my dreamworld relationship. Now that I can talk to people without worrying about his jealousy and insecurity. Now that I can remember who I was before and why I enjoyed life so much.

Yesterday, I looked in the mirror as I was smiling about something and found myself looking at someone I hadn't seen for a while: an unguardged and truly happy me. (A little shaky and nervous about what's to come, but happy!) Last night I went to sleep without worrying about someone else's unresolved issues. I went to sleep looking forward to the future.

It's been a while.

But I am back.

I thank God for being with me on every road I've taken. I thank God for His promise to be with me on the roads ahead. I just thank Jesus for letting me have lived to see another day.

Peace
--Free