Monday, January 21, 2013

**REVIEW** Face & Body Care

Haven't done one in a while, and I really have been meaning to do a review of Bio Oil. It's just about one of my favorite things to keep on hand. Living in Alaska can suck the moisture out of a camel's hump. Imagine what it does to our skin. Bio Oil isn't the only thing, but it's one of my faves. Here it is with the rest of my personal arsenal:

Bio Oil  - Every skincare product does not work for every person, so I can't say what this will do for you. For me, this stuff is like magic. I use it on my face before I go to bed and first thing in the morning. Sometimes, depending on what type of Sahara effect this place has on my skin, I use it once or twice during the day. It goes on oily (duh), but rubs in so well that, at least for me, doesn't stay oily. I'm pretty sure all that massaging it in does good for the circulation. I mostly use it on my face, but when I have concerns about other parts of my body, well, it works good anywhere. (I originally heard about it from women worried about stretch marks after pregnancy. I've never been pregnant, but when that 65 milligrams of prednisone kicked in back in 2011, I looked like I was having somebody's triplets.)

I don't use it on my hair because it's too expensive for that (the oil, not my hair, which is all mine), but I have one friend with dry and kinky-but-I-mean-nappy hair. She doesn't process her hair in any way and says the Bio Oil keeps it soft and moisturized. I have started using the oil on my lips at night and in the morning along with a rub of lemon juice. (Getting these motherpuckers ready for Valentine's Day.) I also use the oil on my elbows and knees. I'd use it on my feet if I thought it would help, but that would be like trying to feed a continent with one Cheese-It. For the normal person with normal feet, Bio Oil is probably perfect. My feet need a quarterly appointment with a lady and her chisel and acid. Yeah. I have no real secrets left.

By the way, if the oil by itself does seem to be too oily for you, but you still want the conditioning of it, just use it on wet skin only. My income-poor ass has done that just to stretch out my supply.

Note that the the website hails Bio Oil as "America's #1 multi-use skincare oil." That may be true, but if you plan to "multi" anything with it and not go broke, try buying it in the 3-pack at Costco or Sam's Club. It's $10 for a 2-oz bottle at the Anchorage Walmart. I paid around $21 at Sam's for a pack with 2 2-oz and 1 4.2-oz bottles. Score!)

***

No 7 - This skincare product  line is by Boots. (Don't ask me. I never heard of this Boots. I thought the product was made by a company called Numbers.) There is a whole range of skincare, makeup, etc. Like I said, I didn't know. I just use the anti-aging serum called "Intense." (Makes me sound like I need a lot of help, don't it?) I literally stumbled over this stuff at Target's. Literally. A tube of it had fallen or been dropped on the floor and I stepped right on top of it and damn near slid to the furniture aisle. Whatever. I recovered my cool gracefully. My friend is the one who looked stupid, giving herself laughing cramps.

What I like most about the product is that it's cheap (about $12), hypo-allergenic, is cheap, goes on smooth, feels amazing and is cheap. It really does feel great on the skin - not greasy but very-- it's true so I have to say it-- intensely moisturizing. On top of being cheap, a little dab goes far. If you live in a normal climate, you probably will never have to use anything along with it. I probably won't in the summertime up here, but right now, I do use it over my Bio Oil in the morning only. (Remember, the Bio Oil soaks into the skin - or that's what it feels like.)

Palmer's Cocoa Butter Formula Moisturizing Body Oil - (My mouth dried out just saying it!) This is cheaper than Bio Oil so I use it on the rest of my body.  Actually, I would use the Palmer's on the rest of my body even if I was Bill Gates' wallet. It's just the best stuff. But I can't use it on my face. Also, I wish it didn't smell all cocoa-buttery, but, hey, the smell doesn't linger too long. This is something I do use on my feet as well just because, between chiselings, it does make those dogs look a little less... arid. Not summer-sandal-worthy, but it keeps them from being bad enough to shred paper with. (Why am I putting myself on blast like this?)

The best thing about this product is how silky it makes you skin feel. You watch, your skin will feel so good, you'll walk around touching yourself. (But don't. At least, not like that. At least, not in public.) I will warn you women: if your man is picky about how you smell, give this oil some time to mellow out before you add any perfume or such. Maybe because I have a thing about perfumes, I find that adding any scent too soon after the Palmer's is like "good + good = funk." Also - and I can't believe I almost forgot to mention this - do not get this crap on fabrics. I have a favorite sheet set that I now can only put on the bed top-part down. Shit. Got a big old bed out of a hooker-motel-looking stain the size of my ass on the sheet. That's because I sat my naked, oiled-up ass on the bed one day.

Anyway.

So, that's the lowdown. Get out there and be cheap and beautiful. You know what I mean.

Peace
--Free

P.S.: my friend pointed out that I didn't mention Oil of Olay's serum this time. That's because they don't pay me. Let me quit fronting: NOBODY pays me to talk up this stuff. I just feel like sharing the news. At any rate, I've talked enough about Olay before. Apparently, the serum is only working for me during the summers now. I guess my skin had a mood swing about seasons or something.

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