Thursday, November 17, 2011

The Breakup

Dear Facebook,

We need to talk. I know, I know, no one in a relationship wants to hear those 4 words, but... Well, I'm just not feeling the way I did when we first started out. Let me try to explain.

At first, you fulfilled all my needs. You were so easy to get along with and you let me hang out with my friends... It was nice. You didn't mind when I got hooked on the games - matter of fact, you encouraged it. You made the games better and better and- Well, you know what I mean. You let me try different things. You let me have a farm with all kinds of cool equipment and buildings. I might not have had the biggest farm around, but it was a pretty one! (I didn't even tell you about the secret farm I had on the side... No matter. I never used it much. When I found out that was cheating, I was too ashamed to do anything with it.)

Not only did you let me have a farm, but when I got bored with that, you let me have my own cafe. Now that is what really made me love you even more. I tell you, I was never happier than during the hours I spent decorating that place, finding just the right name and choosing the dishes... It was pure joy. You did get a little annoyed when I started slacking a little. First with the farm - the crops were just went to weed! Then I just couldn't keep up with the cafe anymore. It just got too complicated, what with all the new and improved equipment and recipes... I almost had no life outside the cafe! And all those other chefs wanting my help. It was  a constant chatter of "Can you send me this? Can you send me that? Will you taste my salad? Will you come season my dish..."  That was bad enough, but I also had the other farmers always pleading for help with planting, sowing and trading. Sheesh! I felt like going into the witness protection program!

But still, that's not your fault. I should have stuck to the simpler pursuits you introduced me to later, like Bejeweled or Collapse. I could handle those without losing hours of my life like an alcoholic having a blackout. Plus, this also gave me more time to spend with my friends. Well, if you can call most of them that.

I was always surprised that you let me have so many friends. Maybe that's because though I ended up with over 200, only about 5 ever came around on a regular basis. The rest of them were never even in the area - not even for a drive-by post - or they only came on to have their say and disappear. Some of them were around on a regular basis - if you wanted to hear about what time they took a deep breath or what song they listened to while stuck in traffic... Then there were those who only ever commented on their own posts. You'd rarely see them visiting anyone else. They were interesting at times, but not that interesting... Yeah, I should have been a little more discriminating. I should have stuck to the friends who had something interesting to say and actually noticed what others had to say. That's what I get for going in for quantity over quality. I could have saved myself the trouble of people who stick their noses in comments made on someone else's post and then get huffy. *shrug* Live and learn.

Now, I'm not here to blame you for the time I wasted in useless farming or restauranteering (and, yes, that is a real word - or at least I think so). Anyway, the real concerns have to do with trust. I feel like I don't know what you are doing from one minute to the next. I feel so vulnerable and never know if you really are protecting me. I mean, I don't want just everybody knowing my business. It's not like sharing such personal things with you has been easy. I mean, I tend to be kind of a private person. Basically, I trust you, but I don't know who all you are associating with. I mean, really! In this day and age you have to be so careful.

Also (and I really didn't want to have to bring this up because it sounds a bit petty, but...) you tend to be a tad moody. I'm sorry, very sorry, but I just had to say it. I mean, I never know what you are going to do from one day to the next. Just when I get used to you being one way, you go and change. If you could ever just give me some kind of warning.  Because I don't mind change, really I don't. You know what we've already been through. And I've stuck with you, right?  It's just that, well, when you want to change something, do something different, maybe spice things up, it would be nice if you'd let me know.

Anyway, that's what I wanted to tell you. I don't know if it will make a difference. After all, I'm just one person out of millions who adore you. You won't miss me if I leave, probably won't even notice. Maybe someday you and I will make a better team, but for now... Well, this is difficult, but I haven't been completely fair to you either. You see, I've started another relationship elsewhere. At first, I just wanted some comfort I wasn't getting from you. I didn't expect to be swept off my feet. It all happened so fast. I had only planned to introduce myself, you know, break the ice and maybe just have a little harmless fun. Before I knew it, I was meeting new friends and having all sorts of interesting encounters... Oh, it was just glorious! Just everything I could want in a relationship.

I'm sorry that things have turned out this way. Even if you care enough to change, I can't give up this new relationship. It just meets my needs in a way that you haven't been able to. Besides, I feel like I've grown so much and learned to choose my friends more wisely. It's like starting over and getting to keep only the best while leaving the worst behind.

I'm not completely out of your life. I will stop by every now and then, when I have time, just to see how everything is going.

Well, I can't stay. I have to get back to... Well, no matter.

Take care! Smooches!