I Didn't Break the Internet, But...

... I did something to my Google Plus! LOL

I was over checking out the latest of "What's Hot" on G+ and... not sure what happened. I was trying to comment on a post I had just read and, um, it disappeared.

I'm not kidding. I am a little bit scared right now. I hope no one over there notices.

Anyway, here is another site showing the article, which is very, very cool. I get sick of young folks throwing the whole "green" thing in my face. This is the perfect response. Enjoy.

Peace
--Free

(P.S.: I'm going back over to G+ to see what the heck I did!!!)

It's Here: 2012

Wow. When I was about 15 or 16, I could not  have conceived of life in 2012. 2000 and 12... Whoa.

So, I made it. Sort of surreal to think of being alive in this year when I was born in 1963. Born into a world of no computers, no cable tv, no cell phones... And living in a world where all of that is almost passe! Wild.

I made resolutions, not many, but a few. I will keep them to myself, but can let you know that I decided it is an easier and less painful life if you only care much for the right people and things.

I wanted to take a picture that symbolized the new year, but can't find even one that begins to cover it. I will have to ask my niece Gabby to draw something for me.

Anyway - here's wishing you all a happy, blessed, healthy, peaceful and joyful 2012. May God keep you under His love.


Here is the best I can do for a pic for now. (Isn't this kid just adorable?) This is going to be a funky-happy new year! lol

Peace
--Free

Tactics for Difficult People?

First, there was the great and much needed  resource of Isaiah 43:1-3 which helped me and several other people I have since talked with. Then there was the information on the Living Wills/Advanced Directives. Now, there is even more information on a subject I had been dealing with over the last few weeks: dealing with difficult people. Surprisingly, this is a little more humorous than you might think.

As you know, I had been having problems with someone who was working a real manipulation on me: breaking me down by ignoring me, diminishing my past achievements and efforts on their behalf while building up someone else in front of me. It almost worked, but I broke through the situation's effect on me with prayer.  Thankfully, it did not damage my very important relationship with the other person they were using.Now that both of us are aware of the situation and dealing with it together. (Might want to go do some warfare with those verses from Isaiah if you are having the same problem! lol)

Anyway, lo and behold, the same person who had been working their subtle little evil on me, recently had the mean-ness turned on them by someone else. Now, I don't think it's right to break people down - no matter who the person is or what they have done. It's just not holy, it's not of any kind of good, and it's pointless mind games. This is one of those hurtful situations you wouldn't wish on even an enemy.

 Here's the deal: Sometimes you can kid someone about something and it won't bother them, where at other times it will bother them. A lot. Just because of their circumstances. For instance, if I tease someone about putting on a few pounds and it was because of the holidays, that's not so bad. Especially if the person is doing well emotionally or okay in the other areas of their life. But if I tease that same person in the same way after, say, they have had a medical problem... Eh, that's not so good. In the first example, you are dealing with someone who is most likely not going to be thinking about your comment five minutes after you say it, It's gonna roll right off of them as they focus on all the other positive stuff they have going on. On the other hand, the person in the second example is likely to take the comment deeper to heart. They might be thinking about the comment and how awful it makes them feel for the next week. How freaking depressing, right? (I have been there and had to pray my way out of the very dark places I was taken.)

Anyway, I say ALL that to set up this: I have a certain family member who obviously has either a loose moral screw, attention deficit disorder (as in he doesn't get enough attention and needs more), or is just plain ignorant. Whatever the case, he has a talent for saying exactly the wrong thing at exactly the worst possible time. This is not just a talent; he has a skill for this. If they handed out Masters degrees for being a jerk, he would have a wall full of them. No kidding. He is a prime-A, foot-in-mouth jerk-a-verbal-looza.

*shaking out the stress & taking a calming breath*

ANYway, what happened was, the Jerk's victim was sharing some really wonderful family news with relatives out of state via Skype. Everyone was suitably happy, congratulatory and family-like. We were all having one of those warm, Walton family moments.

Then the Jerk made his appearance.

After congratulations to the victim, his next comment was a put-down regarding her weight.

Seriously.

He was so quick-draw with it (like he always is) that no one, not even his wife had time to try to sweeten it up. As usual, she suffered her own embarrassment in silence. She might as well, because he would surely turn on her. And there is nothing like a jerk who is smart and verbally quick on his feet.

Anyway, also as usual when the Jerk lets his Dr. Jerk side out, everyone just does the phony "haha" laugh and hopes for the moment to pass quickly. It usually does, but like I said, it lingers for the victim.

Now, I have never been sure why the Jerk is this way, I think his emotional cogs don't mesh right and I have serious questions about his Christianity at times. I think he is aware of his problem and I think he struggles with it (at times), but, like other weaknesses, it is his ongoing battle,

Whatever.

The victim in this case, now gets a taste of their own medicine (though I hate that it came about like it did and when it did. I understand the lingering emotional fallout it can cause). What I want to point out is that there are resources, of sorts, for dealing with these kinds of situations.

There's this site on dealing with difficult people.

Here's another site offering examples and responses.

Personally, I use the ignore and mirror tactic because it's the most honest. You basically ignore most of the person's actions that are too silly for your energy. When they are bothersome, you mirror them - treat them the way they treat you. If you know anything about people, it's that bullies are really cowards and they can rarely take what they can dish out. My tactic is not the most Christian way to handle things, but I am human, after all. I have a LOT of things I can pull from this person's past to bring up. There are incidents with the law that she tries to forget about, incidents where she wasn't on her most moral behavior... Like they say, bullies better guard their secrets very well... And, then, there is the granddaddy of them all: "One day when your kids grow up..." What goes around comes around sooner or later.

At any rate, I hope that you find a successful way to deal with the difficult people in your life. If you remember that they do hurtful things to make them feel better about their own weaknesses, you can work it out. And understand that the negative causes of the whole situation is about them, not you. They are the ones trying to ease some kind of pain with passive-aggressive actions. As my sister pointed out to me when we had a good laugh over our situation, "You have to kind of feel sorry for her and just try to be nice about it." So I do. Most of the time! LOL

Last of all, some humor. If you just need a witty retort sometimes, try these:

• The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech.
  ~ George Bernard Shaw
• I don't take it personally. Everytime you open your mouth you offend someone.
• Well, you probably said it without thinking, the way you do most things.
• It's not what you say, it's the thought behind it that counts and I know there's never much thought behind anything you say.
• Ignoring enemies is the best way to fight.

Mostly, though, when you really just get tired to the hilt of someone's b.s., call them on it. Save that for when you are really, really done with it. Just tell them right to their face what you think they are trying to prove by saying the things they say. Nothing stops b.s. like honest confrontation.

And, seriously - try your hardest to just pray for them. There has to be something wrong with a person who is insensitive. I talk hard about it myself, but as a Christian, I am supposed to continue taking the high road so that maybe they will want to see what the whole "love one another" thing is about.

Peace
--Free

Family Addition

We have, as of yesterday, a new addition to the family. Isn't he gorgeous...

Yes, yes he is! 

For you created my inmost being; 

   you knit me together in my mother’s womb. 

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; 

   your works are wonderful, 

   I know that full well. 

 My frame was not hidden from you 

   when I was made in the secret place, 

   when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. 

 Your eyes saw my unformed body; 

   all the days ordained for me were written in your book 

   before one of them came to be.

Psalm 139:16

Peace

--Free

Powerful

Just saw this over on Google Plus in my stream. This is so powerful and says so much that I just had to share it here.

Peace
--Free

Good Grief, Good Gifts!

I am over here having a fit of the giggles. My nephew-in-law did a great job this year getting gifts for my niece. My sister says she is SO proud of him. Thought I won't say what he got her this year, I do remember the early years of their marriage when he would get the most hilarious gifts. He's come such a long, long way!

One Christmas, he got her this outrageously ugly coat. There isn't a word for the kind of hideousness that was this particular coat. And it had the nerve to come with matching gloves! ROFL. On top of it being what I think the British would call ghastly, it didn't fit quite right. My niece looked uncomfortable, embarrassed and sheepish all at the same time. The way she tried to think of something grateful to say was just priceless. It was my sister and me who just came out and told my nephew that the coat was not really the best gift. They replaced it with something. Too funny.

I don't remember if it was for Christmas or for her birthday that my nephew got the vacuum cleaner. It might even have been for Valentine's Day. He was just so new at getting a female the appropriate gifts.

Well, he has certainly gotten better after 9 years of marriage. My niece will be more than happy this year. This actually gives me something to look forward to on Christmas morning.

I wonder what some of the worst gifts people have gotten for each other? I don't think anything can beat that freaking coat...

Peace
--Free

Mama Wasn't Always Nice

I am over here just cracking up laughing because I heard someone use a saying my mother used to use. I don't know if you've ever heard this, and please pardon the language, but when someone got on my mother's nerves by pestering her, she'd tell them that they could worry the stink out of sh*t.

I have no idea how that is done, but I always died laughing when I heard Mama say it. Variations on the saying included: "The hot out of Hell," "Wet out of water" and others that I can't remember right now.

Another of her sayings is one most people might have heard: "I'll slap the taste out of your mouth!" (I had a smart-alecky cousin who would mutter, "How? You didn't put it there." But she would only mutter it! lol) Another warning was one I heard someone else use: "Knock you out til you wake up smart." I think it was a friend's parent or auntie who said that.

Of course, now I am over hear thinking of some of the things Mama would say that would have us laughing - whether we let her hear us laughing or not!

"Drunker than Cooter Brown" was one of the sayings. To this day, we have no idea who Cooter Brown was or even if he was a real person.

"Musty as a goat" was for someone with body odor.

"Looking like Sista Tuttah" was for when you were dressed slouchy or wearing your hair in a way Mama thought was unattractive. We have no idea who Sister Tuttah is.

"Sitting there with your jaws tight" was for when you called yourself mad or upset about something.

"Knock a knot on your behind" was the threat of a whipping. (And, no, it wasn't child abuse when Mama whipped us. We got it with her hand or a switch, and most kids back then got the same & we turned out just fine, thank you.)

"People in Hell want ice water" was for when you were not going to be getting something you asked for.

"Hello walls" was for rude people who walked into a room without speaking. So was, "I didn't sleep with you last night."

"Losing your manners" meant breaking wind. Maybe because you were showing a lack of manners by doing it around people.

When someone was rude enough to stare at you hard, the saying was "Trying to look the clothes off of me."

We kids had one we used for the adults because they could always seem to hear us no matter how quiet we tried to be: "Mama can hear a rat p*ss on cotton."

My mother had trouble with certain words also. She never said "Lion" but "Louns." Her and my father were a good match because he couldn't say the words "Neither" or "Either." He said "Neezer" and "Eezer." Don't ask. I have no idea why. This gene runs in the family because my sister doesn't say "Stickler" for a picky person. She has what I think is a better word: "Stick-u-lar." (Now doesn't that just make more sense for some reason? LOL)

Wow. I am so glad that this is a good day for my thinking and being able to communicate okay. I will have this post to look back on when I am having trouble with my thought processes. I hope you enjoyed it!

Peace
--Free

My Best Friend

I just wanted to give a shout out to my friend, Jone. This is for her!

I hope everyone has a best friend like I do. My best gal friend comes with a "break in case of emergency" feature! She is always there to laugh with me, cry with me, be silly with me and just be with me. She doesn't give up on me when I get moody & being a total pain in the rear. She is always happy for my successes and never jealous. She is always "real" and never phony. She tells me like it is - whether I like it or not, but only when she knows I can handle it. She lets me tell her like it is & appreciates it. She is funny and sweet and smart and kind. She wears whatever she wants, no matter what anyone else thinks. When we go out to eat, she gives the waiter silly names for us ("Her majesty, queen of Anchorage" or "Betherina"). She drives like a maniac, but will slow down when I start looking faint. She says things like "cool beans" and "groovy." She stands up for herself (and for me) but always treats people with compassion. She doesn't get mad easily and she is SO quick to forgive and pray for someone when they are being ridiculous. She reminds me to be the same way (even when I want to tell them they are ridiculous). She laughs at my jokes. She focuses on my good points and not the negative. She keeps my secrets and WILL judge me, but with love and guidance. When I got fat, she made me laugh about it, then gave me a bunch of clothes that fit. When I am worried about money, she offers what she has. When I am worried about tomorrow, she reminds me to be thankful for today. When I am wanting to be mean about something, she reminds me to play nice. When I get in a mood and don't want to be bothered, I can trust she will be there when I am feeling better. She prays with me and for me ALL THE TIME. Her life has not been easy, but she remains trusting and faithful in the Lord. (If she has ONE fault, it's that she is a complete no-nothing about all things internet! She does use email, though.)

When we first met, she told me it was a "God thing." She's got that right because God made her to order as a friend for me.


So, yeah, I hope everyone has a best friend like mine. 


If you have a friend like this, call them up just to say "Hi, I love ya!" When you can, buy them some candy or a book or do something that will make them smile. Make sure to cherish them because not everyone has a good friend like this.

A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity (Prov17:17)

Peace
--Free

She Speaks!

I don't often plug things, but...

She Speaks is a great place for the ladies to check out product reviews, interact with other members and try products (often for free). If you have a blog, you can also join their blogger community.

I belong to the site and really like the interaction and being able to try new stuff (for free! lol).

(Notice my nifty new badge here on the page)

Maybe I will see you all over there...

Peace
--Free

Honoring Mom

Thinking about my mother and how I believe that we, as a family, children she raised, have let her down in so many ways.

Mom was the strength that held us together, made us want to love each other, mended rifts between us, kept us brothers and sisters, made us better parents, aunts and uncles. Now that she is gone, it's as though we have forgotten all that she taught us about being a family, love and respect and compassion.

\With all that she taught us, Mom should have been able to leave us knowing that we wouldn't forget or  put aside all those lessons, but we have. With her gone, there is nothing holding  us together, nothing keeping  us respectful of the elder ones and watchful over the younger ones. The older ones aren't passing along the basic manners and principles of respect, and the younger ones are not willing to remember or learn.

It makes me sad to think how disappointed Mom would be.

All I can do is keep honoring her by being the way she was and by dealing with things the way she would have. It's hard, but I'd rather keep honoring her than to forget, even though that would make things easier sometimes.

If your parents are still with you, listen to their lessons now. Start teaching the young people why those lessons are important and not to be discarded as they begin to think of themselves as "grown." Etch the wisdom of your parents in your heart now so that you will be saved a lot of grief later.

Remember that some things don't go out of fashion: manners, respect for elders, compassion for youth, family bonds and parental wisdom, If you forget this, one day you will  have children and learn what heartaches can be caused by the lack of these things.

Peace
--Free