Time Feels So Weird Now

 I have spoken here before about my depression. It's been a while since I have had a bad "episode", but those damn blues are back.

What I've wondered for the past couple of weeks is what triggered my depression this time. My brother mentioned how the daylight savings affected a lot of people this year. I can't be sure if that's the problem, but I know that the time change was worse for me this time. Normally, I barely notice the change after the first day. This year, it took a week before I got back into rhythm with the time change. And what is the point of DST these days? Arizona and Hawaii do fine without it.

The other thing I've noticed is how weird time feels to me lately. As I have aged, like a lot of people, time seems to move faster for me, but these days, it's gotten bizarre. I had a weird thing happen. Late yesterday, I was making some medical appointments and noting them on my calendar. For one of the appointments, I was thinking of calling the doctor's office with a question, but it was after hours. This morning when I got up, I called the office only to get the "closed" message. That's when I realized this is Saturday. I don't remember Friday at all. Does that make sense?

I live on a schedule because it's how I keep sane. I clean on a schedule, I pay bills on a schedule, and I have a certain day that I do laundry, check my appointments calendar, etc. Because I tend to be foggy-brained half the time, doing things on a schedule helps keep my life on track. I don't understand how I skipped an entire day. Is that something caused by my depression? Or is the time thing the cause of my depression? I don't even know how to ask my doctor about this because it sounds so crazy.

Time has felt weird or "off", in my opinion, for a while. It's as if too much is happening too fast all the time. Lately, I don't even like to read the news because it's almost over-stimulating. 

I remember hearing something like what is shown in the following meme, and I've never forgotten the explanation:

Hmmm... I wonder what means when you feel like you're skipping whole days.

Is this strangeness affecting only me, or are others feeling this way? My brother, when I asked him, agreed with me but he might be just saying that, so I don't feel crazy. 

Anyway, I'm going to start asking people if they are noticing this weirdness.

Peace

--Free

Buying Less to Buy Better

For parts of last year and then then for the last few weeks of summer, I took some time to clear out some things. I was able to donate to a local center a lot of tops and jeans and even a jacket and some footwear. Let me be completely honest and admit that I didn't start out doing it to be charitable. My initial intention was to get rid of so clothing I don't wear or fit or want. 

What that little project made me realize was how many cheap clothes I have/had. I would literally have multiple pairs of the same cheap brand of jeans that look almost identical. The same thing goes for my tops. I buy the same style and toss them when they wear out. My jeans last at least 3 or 4 years before they start looking not just comfy but sort of raggedy. My tops usually start getting "pills" or loose threads after a year or more.

I've always heard my parents talk about buying better things that last. That seemed to be easier up until about 15 years ago. More people could afford good shoes and work clothing; you could still find actual denim jeans without too much wallet pain. Then cheap clothing became "the thing" - either just for me or for more people than usual. Or maybe it just seems that way to me.

Lately, I have been thinking a lot about just wearing everything I have until it falls apart and replacing it with better quality items. Every year, my family lets me pick what I want for Christmas, my birthday, Mother's Day, and any other special occasion. I think from now on, I will ask for something from L.L. Bean or some other place of good quality items. 

When I first started thinking of this, I wondered just how pricey such items could be. It turns out that out that you can find quite a few things in markdown, used, or during a special pricing event. I found really good jeans at a couple of sites for $50-$70. If buying new, a lot of places offer "lifetime" warranties or repairs. At my age, I don't think I have to worry about years and years of use!

Before I plan anything though, I have to wear out what I have. I have some jeans and tops to wear out, but I can use a good jacket or pair of everyday walking shoes. If, like me, you have ever wondered where to find some quality items, there are several options:

• Poshmark - a lot of used or discounted items from the "better" retailers. Just make sure to compare the used prices to those posted on a brand's site.
• eBay - same as for the above. Also, make sure you find a reliable or verified seller.
• Darn Tough - the have socks that are supposed to be the best.
• Patagonia - The even have a "used" section & the let you trade in your used Patagonia items.
• L.L. Bean - no intro needed. They do have several discounted items.
• Filson - new to me. They have some wear for serious business.
• Marmot - again, new to me, but for serious outdoor wear - though they have other stuff.
• Kuhl - another new one, but they have some nice-looking jeans.

You get the idea. For more suggestions, check in with Reddit. Also, I found this list to peruse.

I'm really starting to think that certain items are not worth having if they have to be replaced too often. At any rate, it's going to be something to consider from now on.

Peace

--Free

Cheap & Fun Winter Therapy

 My depression has been creeping up on me again. It has nothing to do with the change of seasons (I survived Alaska so Iowa can't touch that!). I think this is just a normal cycle - a sort of ebb and flow that my depression does. At any rate, I am fighting back. I'm eating better and I'm exercising more. In addition, one of my nieces turned me on to a little bit of DIY therapy.

It's literally DIY. She got me one of those paint-by-number kits after I saw one at her place. She had some smaller ones but when I picked mine, I didn't notice the size...

That's what it looks like on the product page. Who knows what I will have it looking like! But I love the idea. It comes with everything I need to get it done - paints and brushes, and even little hangers.

Yeah. It's quite large at 16"x20". I like it a lot but it's probably going to take my brat of a brain forever to get it done. This is what I have managed over the past couple of weeks. Don't laugh! Or at least wait til I've finished.

In addition to the paints being shown,
there's a copy of the pic to follow.

I have very limited room to work in. I used a piece of cardboard as my workspace and just do as much as my head will let me before I get tired. Next time, I will go smaller!

Seriously, though, I can really say that the project is very therapeutic. My anxiety goes way down when I spend just half an hour working on this - and most of that time is setting out the paints and cleaning water! I actually think it helps my brain too. I have to focus on some details and keep my hands steady. 

I've already told some of my neighbors about this. A lot of them struggle with depression or cognitive issues because of age and life situations. Some of the folks here do puzzles together, but this is something they can work on whenever they need to calm down or relax.

If you decide to try one of these kinds of paintings, trust me, go small for the first one!

Peace

--Free

P.S.: BTW, when I went back looking for smaller items, I realized how affordable they are. The one I'm working on was less than $10! That's amazing for what you get.

DISCLAIMER: I am not/will not be compensated in any way for any products mentioned in this post and there are no affiliate links. I am not a suggesting/advising anyone use any product mentioned. I am only sharing my experiences and feedback.

The Madness of Beauty Trends (or Skin of the Week)

 I was just recently talking about being more frugal with beauty purchases. We all want to take care of our skin and hair - or just look nice - and I'm glad there are a variety of products out there. The problem is there are too many products out there. Not just that, but there are trends coming and going so fast that it's hard to keep up.

The K-beauty trend is one I latched on to a few years ago. I immediately loved the whole idea of focusing on my skin's health and not just being vain. Also, I realized K-beauty as something people of my mother's generation understood, that good skin and hair care is not just about what you use but about consistency. One difference is, my elders stuck to a soaps and lotions while K-beauty can be very involved if you let it. I don't I stick to a wash, tone and hydrate routine, using the occasional mask.

So, while K-beauty is something I appreciate, now that it's become so popular in Western culture, it's getting a little crazy. I have to restrain myself from getting swept up in all the madness and just stick that what has been working for me.

I use a few basic K-beauty products along with a few others that have worked well, but I almost got hooked on the "glass skin" trend. Almost. I was this close to adding a bunch of things to my routine before common sense kicked in. And it's a good thing because, while glass skin was so the thing yesterday, a new thing is "silk skin". I just barely finished reading about that when I saw an article on "butter skin". What? The trends are just whizzing by in a blur!

Let's go through them briefly:

• Glass skin is when your skin looks almost Sim-like - super smooth and pore-free. Think of what some people look like after they've filtered the heck out of their Instagram photos. It looks flawless and glass smooth.
  
• Silk skin - the best way I can describe this is to say that it's smooth and flawless but without the glass skin shine. 
• 
  Butter skin (and this is what I think I've been trying to achieve without knowing about it) is a lot like silk skin except looking very matte. If you've ever seen an ad for a product that promises to "blur" skin imperfections, you'll know what I mean.

I expect the next trend will be to look as much like an AI as possible - no pores, no smile lines, no humanity. 

While I sometimes get a little frustrated by the adult fixation on skincare, I don't know how to feel about getting kids into the mix. These folks are starting a skincare line for kids and... I don't know. I think that it's enough to teach kids to use sunscreen (of course) and lotion or oil on their skin. I'm not sure I want to create more consumerism by getting them into using masks. Let kids be kids. Teach them good hygiene; protect them against harmful sun rays and ashy skin, and make sure they brush and floss. Isn't that enough?

Anyway.

I think people should stop jumping from skincare trend to skincare trend - because they all have a different set of products - and stick with what works. And that's coming from someone who loves trying a new product every now and then. I just try not to go crazy with every new thing that comes around. No one could possibly keep up with that.

Maybe next time, I can discuss haircare trends...

Peace

--Free