Travel Tips From a Novice

Just a quickie post since I'm leaving on Thursday and won't post for a minute.

I'm not a person who travels a lot (and y'all know how I hate flying), but I have done my share. I thought I would pass on a few tips that I've learned over the past several years. (NOTE: Things change so none of this is written in stone.)

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• Check here to see what the rules are about what you can and cannot take on your flight!
• If you can, try to get luggage where the 2 main pieces match closely in size. Most airlines give you the same weight allowance for both bags (if you are given the option of 2 bags). This time, I get 50lbs for each of my 2 bags (for which I'm paying a very reasonable fee) and I was able to make the best use of every pound. 
• Make sure to "try on" your luggage and carry-ons before you leave. Make sure you can handle the luggage solo (should you have to) and that you are comfortable with the weight of your carry-on items. Can you hold or wear it all without straining your hands or body? Can you walk quite a way holding it all? Can you easily access your money, tickets, and other essentials? True story: I once found myself at DFW, trying to balance one piece of luggage on another because I  had started out with a travel partner who got sidelined during the return trip. It took forever to find a porter to help me out.
• If you are going for an extended stay somewhere (or if you are going to have a lot of excess luggage), it's cheaper at times to use USPS's Flat Rate boxes and mail things ahead. It's fast, insured (to a point) and you can even request items be held for pick-up.
• Invest in empty bottles and containers from the "dollar" shelf at a store. You can take a lot of essentials (shampoo/conditioner, lotions, etc.) by using the containers and tucking them throughout your luggage. Much easier to tighten up your packing space with smaller containers. 
• To save room in bags, you can tuck some things (like your containers from above) into socks or shoes,
• Never, ever pack your essential medications in checked luggage. You might get stranded at a layover, or your luggage could simply get lost or delayed. I had an aunt visit once and we ended up taking her to the local air base to get an emergency replacement of a daily med that was lost with her checked luggage. Her luggage was located - three days after her flight landed.
• Always keep a bit of cash on hand - but also keep a debit or credit card handy. Some (if not most) airlines don't accept cash for in-flight items.  If you don't have (or want a credit card), get a re-loadable Visa or MasterCard. These are available at most big box stores. (By the way, these cards are great for buying things online or applying for trial versions of services.)
• Unless necessary, don't dress to impress. That was fine when air travel was a major, major luxury. These days, you might get stranded somewhere or have to jog half a mile to a gate. Dress for cleanliness, comfort, and neatness. Comfy footwear is essential! If you do make the mistake of wearing tight shoes on a plane (or train, or long auto ride) do not take them off. Your feet might swell and then you have to get your dawgs back into those already tight shoes. (Trust me on this one.  I had a bad experience thirty years ago that I only was able to laugh at about 5 years ago...)
• Keep baby wipes, talcum powder, and deodorant in your carry on - even if you have to get the teensy-tiny trial/travel sizes. Again, you don't know what kind of delays you might run into. Baby wipes are good for freshening the body or, in some cases, getting small stains or lint off clothing. Talcum powder helps keep your body cool and fresh-smelling. I like to dress in layers when I travel (maybe a cami or t-shirt under my outer top) and I will dash the powder in between the layers to keep me comfy. 

• If you happen to have extremely long (or multiple) layovers, you might want to look into paying for a day pass to an airline club room. I detail my experience with one in this post. Well worth it if you are traveling at a personally stressful time or just want to treat yourself.
• Ladies, keep a bandana or headband or some hair clips in your carry on. You might start out having a good hair day but there's nothing like some unexpected stress to ruin that achievement.
• I also suggest not wearing a full face of makeup. Makeup can be drying. The canned in-flight air is drying. It's better to do a little touch-up just before landing on the last leg of your flight. You might want to dab your face with a wet towel or napkin to keep your skin happy.
• Enjoy the layovers. Don't just people-watch; try interacting with other travelers. Of course, you want to be careful, but how often do you get a chance to spend time around people from so many different places? 
• If you are a loner and want to kill time on layovers (or onboard), you can see if your local library has electronic reading/listening services for mobile devices. Make sure to fully download the books for offline use. (I use the Overdrive app to borrow audiobooks from my local library. After downloading the app, all I needed was my library card to sign in an.) You can use the Overdrive app on PC as well as mobile devices. Check a previous post about the app.
• Use the bathroom at every layover if you can. I don't know about you, but once I get on a plane, I don't like to leave my seat. Depending on your location, you're bumping and squeezing past other passengers coming and going. 
• This last tip is one that I am only half-sure about but it's always worked for me so I wanted to share it: Try to download the app for whichever airline you're traveling with. Whenever I have done this and gotten an electronic boarding pass, I've usually been given the wonderful, delightful gift of TSA Pre-check. I'm not sure if it's because of the electronic pass or the credit card tied to my ID and ticket, but it is lovely. I know that you can apply for and pay a fee to get the luxury of pre-check, but I don't have the budget for that. Only once did my pre-check status get ignored and I didn't mind at all because it was during a high-security alert. So, basically, I'm not sure how I got picked for the pre-check so I can't swear how it works. I'll see tomorrow when I do my check-in via the phone app.

For some of you, these tips are ho-hum but, for a lot of people, travel is not an everyday thing. I hope that these tips help make your next flight easier.

Keep me in your thoughts and prayers as I get ready to head out and into a new chapter of my life.

Peace

--Free

Sorrow, Not Regret

Talking to a (temporarily) depressed friend the other day, I could hear in her voice that the root of her mood came from thinking of all the regrets she has. Looking back on only the sorrows of life can bring anybody down. I've done it many times, and I'm sure most people have.

One thing about trying to talk a friend out of a low mood is that your words of advice often will shine back and light up your own situation. That's what happened for me. I didn't notice it until late last night when I was having one of those pity parties myself.

This was a pity party of one, brought on by having too much left to do in preparation for Iowa and letting myself get worked up into a state of post-midnight anxiety. If my family had been awake, I would have been distracted by the chaos that is our usual mode of being together under one roof. But it was late, I was tired and too wired to sleep, and I'm pretty sure that the smoked fish I had for a snack was acting as a organic hallucinogen.

I went from thinking of what to pack into the two suitcases I'm taking with me to wondering if I shouldn't add a third suitcase to wondering about the meaning of all life and afterlife. I actually got up and went outside for a while to stand in the rain and have a conversation with God (who was probably musing at how often we silly humans think for some reason that we have to be looking at something - the sky, tall trees, birds - to talk to Him). While I was outside, it started to rain and, as a result, I went back to the bedroom with not only a full-fledged case of self-inflicted anxiety but nappy hair and damp clothes.

Regrets are rude guests, always coming for a visit at the wrong time and when you are not in a mood to entertain them. They are really only good for one thing: reminding you that you have to be compassionate enough to have them over for company.

except maybe for that really bad high school haircut

Anyway, I said my prayers and lay down to try to sleep. Of course, once I started to relax, I started remembering everything I'd said to my friend. I hadn't said much (for me), but the basic piece of advice I gave her is probably something I retained from what my mother taught me:

Instead of only thinking of what you would undo if you could, try realizing that all choices can have good and bad consequences.

Yes, I could have remained with that first person who loved me. We could have spent all these years celebrating milestones and accomplishments as a couple. On the other hand, we might have separated anyway. We might have done more damage to each other had we stayed together any longer.

I could have taken a different job, or lived in different places, or done so many other things differently in my life.

But I didn't. And you know what? That's okay. It has to be. And it will be.

#SimpleTruth

Like I told my friend, there is no need regretting yesterday because there are no refunds. We can't go back and change anything, but we can live as a person who is changed for the better by the regrets we have.

When I went to sleep, I felt better. When I woke up, I certainly felt better. What I hope to remember from here on out is that I will always have some sorrow, but I'm never going to give time to past regrets.

Sing it, Ella!

Peace
--Free

They Call It 'Motherwit'

This post is for my mother. She had a million bits of simple advice for me, no matter what problem I was having. I miss her and I love sharing the things she taught me.

When you feel sad:
'Sad' passes if you let it; if it doesn't, get help. Remember a time when you were not sad. Realize you won't always be sad. Watch something that makes you laugh so hard your stomach aches. Call up that friend who, you know when come running when you say you are sad. Take a long drive to nowhere in particular while playing great music.

When you feel happy:
Remember when you weren't happy. Think about someone who might not feel happy and do something for them. Say "Thank you" to good people in your life, even if you only say it in your heart. Do some of the things you don't have energy to do when you aren't happy. Stop for a moment and just feel the joy. You won't always feel this way, so cherish it.

When you feel lonely:
Know you aren't alone in feeling lonely. Make 'lonely' work for you. Remember when you didn't feel lonely. Find someone else who feels lonely. Get help, get comfort, get advice. Make changes.

When you feel on top of the world:
Know that feeling won't last. Remember when you didn't feel on top of the world. Think of how you can help someone who has never felt that way. Be good to people. Be humble. Don't be an ass about it.

When you feel beautiful on the outside:
Try to be as beautiful on the inside. Know that you won't always be beautiful on the outside. Know that 'beautiful' means different things to different people. Love everyone as much as you would if you weren't so beautiful. Love yourself as much as you would if you weren't so beautiful. Understand that beauty only matters as much as it matters.

When you feel beautiful on the inside:
Be thankful and hope that all people learn to feel that way.

When you feel ugly on the outside:
Know that being ugly outside doesn't mean you need to be an ugly person. Someone is going to find you beautiful if you find yourself beautiful. Accept yourself. Don't worry about 'ugly' beautiful people. Realize that there's a difference between 'ugly' and 'miserable' - then decide which you want to be.

When you feel ugly inside:
Get help. Make changes. Examine your heart.

When you feel overwhelmed:
First ask yourself why you feel overwhelmed. Start somewhere - anywhere - but don't linger on how you feel. Do one thing, then one more thing, and another. Ask someone for help. Stop and take a moment to just breathe. Back away from it all and come back when you are calmer.

When you feel unloved:
Love someone else. Comfort someone. Know that you just haven't met the person who can love you.Know that God loves you.

When you feel like you can't go on:
Ask yourself if anyone else has ever felt this way (and, in case you didn't know, everyone sometimes feels this way). Know that you must go on.  Know that you are needed by someone in this world - whether you know it or not. Want to wait for that person who needs you. Remember that, like everything - good or bad - this too will pass.

If you lose someone you thought was a friend:
Some friends are friends, some friends are not. Real friends will grow with you as life changes. Life changes, people change. Remember: you only thought they were a friend; now, at least, you know the truth.

When you get your heart broken:
Get his/her heart before you give him/her your body. A broken heart will teach your soul lessons. A real 'lover' is not defined in the bedroom. If you learned anything, it was worth the pain.

When you have life regrets:
A regret is only a regret if it didn't make you a better person. Don't miss doing today by thinking about yesterday. Don't forget, just don't linger.

Peace
--Free