Needed A Break (or one thing or another)

One Thing

I've been taking a break from social media and even this blog. This is the first time in a while that I haven't had any posts off to the side that I could schedule to have something posted in my absence.

I was prompted to dump social media when I went through a bad life event. Only a very few people knew what happened because there are only a very few people who stay in touch outside of social media. It was only after a few weeks that any more people knew what I had been going through and I realized that a lot of friends and family expect news - no matter how painful and personal - to be shared via Facebook. I refuse

this is SO perfectly my mood

to use Facebook (or Instagram, et al) for some things. I have decided that if someone has my phone number or home address, they just won't be hearing about some happenings in my life on Facebook.. So, basically, I now use Facebook and Instagram for the sharing of general information. My life is not for broadcast. At least the Real Housewives get paid for letting the world into their lives.

Anyway. That rant is over.

The Next Thing

Being away from Facebook and Instagram has been pretty awesome. I hadn't realized how much those platforms are like bad carbs: kind of yummy in the moment but with awful payback. I'm still not on the 'Book or the 'Gram but I missed my blog so here I am.

My body seems to be in rebellion. In just about a month's time, I've had 2 colds. The best thing about all that is that I'm down more pounds than when I am actively dieting. How sad is it that this is a life highlight?

On the serious side, I have lost my appetite for most foods. I am going to have to ask my docs about that on the next appointment. For the past I'd say 3 weeks, all I have been able to eat is rice and vegetables. Brown rice and white rice. I just have no taste for anything else. I did lose one of my back teeth - probably from the bone-depleting meds I am on - but losing a tooth has never stopped me enjoying my food! Right now, I could teach a course in ways to eat rice. I've had rice with mixed vegetables, rice with collard greens, rice with bits of ham, rice with soy sauce, rice with egg, rice with creamed soups, rice with vanilla soy milk and nutmeg, and rice with just a little butter and salt and pepper.

I don't think that the mainly-rice diet is hurting me any because I am no more fatigued than usual. I actually think that I feel somewhat better. If I could kick the fatigue and keep my brain halfway straight for ten minutes at a time, I would be a pretty happy gal.

And, yes, I realize that I am kind of rambling here. This is, after all, a catch-up post. So what else has been happening?

I have jumped onto the probiotics bandwagon. I decided to give them a try when I started losing my appetite. I did a little bit of research and tried one brand that worked great but was out of my budget. I am now trying another brand that is both pro- and pre-biotic. They do seem to make my stomach feel better. I am a lot more, ~cough~ regular than normal. So, there's that bit of oversharing of news...

Another Thing

Let's get back to ranting for a moment. Maybe someone out there will be able to relate to this one better and maybe even help me out with some advice. Let me lay this out for you:

I was using my laptop to check my email one day about a month ago. This was right after one of those irritating Microsoft updates that happened when I rebooted the computer. So, I am checking my mail and I  four accounts so I have 4 tabs open, plus I had another tab up to moderate blog comments. After being online for about ten minutes, my computer started making this noise - like the fan (?) was over-revving. It got to the point where the whole computer was vibrating.

Of course, I shut it down immediately. I was afraid that it was overheating or something.

I felt like weeping. One thing I do NOT need right now is computer problems. I just lowered my cellphone bill and cut back on a couple of other bills. There is no way that I can afford to replace my computer. Honestly, I can't even afford to have my computer repaired at this point.

I used some compressed air to clear out any dust and that wasn't the problem. I am very fussy about keeping my computer clean and maintained so I didn't expect dust to be the problem anyway. I decided to just let the computer rest for the time being.

To keep from using the computer until I could figure out what was going on, I use my phone and search for "Why is my ASUS vibrating and making noise" (or it was something like that) and the first useful responses were to do with the latest Microsoft update causing problems.

This is why I am starting to HATE Microsoft. I promise that when I do get another computer, I am going to have someone help me install another operating system.

I won't go into too much detail, but I have tried uninstalling updates, reinstalling them and not reinstalling them. I did a system restore and everything else I could think of. I am just simply pissed and done with Microsoft. I can't wait to get a new operating system.

That's all still up in the air. I will let you know when (if) I get it sorted.

The Last Thing

I was recently in a battle with my mailman. Because I don't have enough crappy stuff going on in my life. 

The problem I was having is that I do most of my shopping online - from groceries to basic household items - and not every retailer uses UPS (or even the less desirable FedEx). Any time I was expecting something via USPS, there was an issue. Last winter, our mailman was pretending that he couldn't "access" the building. Funny how he could access the building to put mail in the wall boxes but had problems delivering parcels that didn't fit in those boxes... Thankfully, the local Post Office is literally across the street from our building, we could pick up our items on the same day. Once we all started to complain every time we walked over to get our parcels, the problem seemed to be resolved. That was last year.

This year - starting a few months back - we all noticed that the same thing was happening. Because I tend to track my parcels and get updates via text message, I came up with a plan. One day when I had a package due, I went up front and parked myself in the lounge so I could accost the mailman. I watched him sort all the mail into the boxes and start to leave. I stopped him and showed him my text and asked if he didn't have that package with him. 

Oh... The look on his face when he had to hand me the package, knowing that when I checked my box there would be one of those non-delivery slips. Yeah. There have been no further problems. Unless that dude goes postal on us.

So anyway, that is what's been happening. Now that I have all that out of my system, I will get back to doing some product reviews and other informative blogging. By the way, I recently was chosen to be one of the Walmart Spark reviewers. I have already put in for the first item so I will definitely do that review here. Also, I did get another vape pen courtesy a Visa gift card someone sent me for Christmas. I will probably do a review on that device. In the meantime, I am glad to be at least somewhat back and online. If my computer doesn't die soon...

Peace

--Free

I fell in love with this when the kids would play the game. Just so soothing. 

*REVIEW Revisit** DIM (Di-indolyl Methane)

Back in May, when I was still prepping for moving, I started taking this amazing supplement. It's for balancing estrogen levels, but I like to think of it as my "Fatigue Fighter":

Now, usually when I review a product, I'm done and move on. Sometimes, I will go and do a little bit of an in-post update. Rarely, do I return to do an update in a separate post. This time, I just had to.

I was pretty happy with DIM when I first started using it. Like, from the very first day. It's one of the few supplements that I was faithful about taking. I hate pills and tablets and I already have to take enough of them. It's not like I want to add something else to the mix. In this case though, I really feel that these tablets help. DIM gives me added energy (I can always use more of that!) in addition to helping with my depression.

Free of GMOs, gluten, soy & dairy

If you really want to know if a supplement works for you, try running out of it. That's what happened to me.

In the midst of moving from my temporary digs at my brother's place and into my new apartment, I ran out of DIM. I took the last tablet and kept the bottle to remind myself to order more when I could budget for it. To be honest, I didn't think about it again after a few days. I was too busy getting to doctors' appointments, getting utilities set up, and just stocking up on basic household necessities. Like food.

After my last infusion, I felt worse than I ever have after a treatment. Then, when I took my weekly shot at home, I got so sick that I almost wanted to die. Getting slightly sick and extra fatigued is normal after my shot - for a couple of days. This time, I was so nauseous that I got dehydrated. A couple of times, I literally crawled part of the way to the bathroom. It went on for three and half days!

Once the med-sick wore down a bit, I was wiped totally out. Getting to the kitchen to heat up soup in the microwave made me want to nap for a couple of hours. At least the nausea had passed though, I was so happy about that, the fatigue didn't matter as much.

When I got back to "normal", I skipped my next shot. I had so much left to unpack and put away. I managed that, but I was dragging butt the whole time. I'd spend half and hour getting stuff done, then have to rest for an hour.

My nephews were bringing the last of my belongings from their place and when I opened up a bag, the empty DIM bottle rolled out.

To cut to the chase, I had the extra bucks to order another bottle of DIM so I did. With a quickness. I mean, I cut back on some of my grocery spending so that I could afford the DIM. That's how seriously I wanted it because I remembered what it had done for me before.

I am back using the supplement as of today. I didn't get the immediate boost of energy that I did the first time. That was disappointing until I realized that I'm way, way more run down than I have been for a while. Regular fatigue is bad enough, but after moving and still getting settled in (and don't forget what I think of as Hell Week after that infusion), I guess this super fatigue is to be expected. The DIM might take a couple of days to give me a bit of an  energy boost. However, I can tell you that my mood was better today than it has been for a couple of weeks.

Of course, you need to check with your healthcare team to see if this is something you can or should use. I think too many of us who are battling with an illness tend to jump on every supplement band wagon that comes along. We want so desperately to feel better, but we have to be careful we aren't making things worse. Amen?

This, this, THIS!!

This is, I suppose, my report about at least one supplement that not only works for me but that feels necessary. And, yes,
I am going to let my new doctors know about my experience with it - not just because I have to inform them of anything I take anyway, but because it might be something they can look into for other people to use.

Peace
--Free

Fatigue & Relief

So I have mostly finished getting set up here in my new town. The apartment is awesome, the neighbors are great, and I only wish I had more energy to get back to the book.

I have had my appointment with my new rheumatologist here. While he does not seem very familiar with sarcoidosis, he is a kind and attentive doctor who seems like he will be watching things carefully. The second time I saw him, I forgot to take my BP meds pre-appointment and ended up spending a few hours in the ER. (See, my other docs knew me well enough. If I forgot my meds, they made sure I took them right away and everything would settle down.) I guess I should be thankful that my new doc refuses to take chances. And I bet I won't ever, EVER forget to take my meds pre-appointment, no matter how early I have to be there.

This weekend is not the best. it would be awesome if I felt better, There is live music at the park that I can hear from my open window; the weather has cooled down to the right side of enjoyable; and I don't have my writing desk set up to do anything yet. I should be strolling down to the green to enjoy the music. Instead, I'm stuck inside, watching videos, reading, and blogging. I'm too drained to make the 2-block walk. Thankfully, I made it to the store earlier this morning before this fatigue sunk in. I'm pretty sure the problem is that I haven't had my regularly scheduled infusion. By the time I get it next week, I will be over 2 weeks behind. I never realized how much the infusions helped some of my symptoms.

I guess that, instead of complaining, I should be talking the positives. After all, even though I can't get to the park, I did make it outside for a while to enjoy the beautiful weather. And it really is a spectacular day out. Just a while ago, I went out and fed bread ends to the birds and squirrels! I'm still fascinated by the little creatures who are so friendly with us humans. Remember the friends I made while in the courtyard at my brother's apartment?




Speaking of peaceful, here is a shot of the very peaceful morning on Main:

That's from when I walked over to pick up some foodstuffs.  For a minute, I wondered if something was wrong, then I remembered. Sunday morning. It was so quiet that all I could hear was bird song. Did I mention that this is a "church" town? Sunday mornings are for worship and family. I think that there are about 4 churches in a 6-block radius of my building!

So, yeah, it sucks that I'm stuck inside on a pretty day but, on the other hand, I could be stuck inside and miserable. All in all, I realized how blessed I am. Hopefully, after the infusion I'll feel so much better.

Once I am feeling a bit more up to speed, I will be getting back to work on the book!

Peace
--Free

**REVIEW** Plantation Brand Blackstrap Molasses

Let me start this by pasting in what I shared on Google Plus back on the 18th of February:

The fatigue has been serious for a few weeks now. The ferrous sulfate docs give me causes constipation (yeah, sorry). 
Today, while at the infusion center, another patient (older lady visiting from Georgia) reminded me of an old remedy for "tired blood". 
Her: Where are you from, baby? Me: Texas, but raised here in Alaska. Her: Your mother from Texas and you never heard of using 'strap? Me: (Thinking of whoopings I got) Yes, ma'am. Strap, switch, belt... Her: No, honey. Blackstrap Molasses! 
And then I did remember! And I_hated_ that ' strap as much as I hated whoopings. I have learned in the past few years how to mask the taste of things that are good for me. 
I dragged my behind to the store after treatment and picked up some 'strap! 
I swear this is the same slavery time brand my mother used! 😲
I got home and slept for 4 hours, woke up and made some coffee and added a spoon of the 'strap (and I'm always going to call it that!) 
Still dog tired, but I'm going to keep adding 'strap to my coffee and see if it helps.

I'm drinking some in black tea now. After this, bed. 😴😴😴

#fatigue#chronicdisease#sarcoidosis #lifeisstillbeautiful#iamblessed#iamjoyful#nothingsgoingtobreakmystride#naturalhealthremedy#workedformymama #plantationblackmolasses #plantationseriously#evenauntjemimagotamakeover


Yes, it was like that. Here is the brand of molasses I'm talking about:

Okay, aside from my jabbing at the brand's name, I have to tell you what an impact this product has made on my life.

The very next day (after taking that first dose of 'strap), I put another 1/2 tablespoon in my morning coffee. Even though I felt much better than I usually do after an infusion, I knew I was going to have to find another way to get my 'strap dosage. It was not bad in coffee, but made it a little heavy tasting. Later, while looking up more information about molasses, I ran across a more delicious way to get my daily dose:

Tablespoon of the molasses in bottom of a coffee cup
Couple of drops of hot water to cover the molasses (to soften/thin it)
Stir the water and molasses
Add 8 ounces (or more) of your choice of cold dairy or soy (I use vanilla soy)
Stir well and enjoy
(Of course, I modified the recipe and will sometimes drop in a frozen cube of coconut milk! )

To me, the taste is like chocolate. Like I said, I have added a cube of coconut mile, but I also enjoy this as a warm drink before bed. At any rate, mixed with the soy, the molasses takes on a whole new (better) flavor. I bet parents could probably get their kids to drink it. Check with your doctor first!

The best thing about getting my energy from the molasses is that I don't get the constipation that iron pills cause. I thought it might be because of the added dairy/soy, but I found that BSM is used as constipation reliever. Also, it's just nice not to have one more pill to deal with.

Even if you're not concerned with fatigue, there are lots of uses for 'strap (I kind of knew about baked beans, but forgot all about BBQ sauces!):

• Considered an affordable "superfood"
• Uses of, varieties of, and other info on BSM
• 11 ways to use blackstrap (BBQ sauce included here)
• Cookie and bread recipes
• Light vs Dark molasses. Some info for cooking.
• Using for hair. Unsulphered vs sulphered molasses
• A recipe using cocoa powder.
• Blackstrap is vegan, apparently.
• Some vegan recipes (including a BSM one)
• As a remedy for acne (stroll down)

The brand that was available at my local health food store was Plantation (yeah), but I did find a more affordable brand (with slightly different nutrient levels) on Amazon. As far as I can tell, 'strap will "keep" for  up to 4 months or more without losing quality.

Plantation label

Golden Barrel label

Since there are several brands, I am going to be making future purchases based on nutrition labels (I've order the Golden Barrel brand), taste, and price. Availability here in Anchorage is limited to our health food stores (as far as I know) but, depending on where you live, you might be able to find it in grocery stores. I'm pretty sure my mother and grandmothers living in Texas weren't hitting Whole Foods in the '60s and '70s!

If you know of more information about 'strap, let me know.

Peace

--Free

Monday, Monday

I spent a weekend with the satellite screwed up for the bedroom television. So, I did some reading and thinking - all t.v.-free. Read Michael Dyson's analysis of the music of Marvin Gaye in the book "Mercy, mercy me : the art, loves, and demons of Marvin Gaye." (Of course, then I had to jump online and have the Loussac Library hold some Marvin CDs for me. I just HAVE to listen again to the songs to get what Dyson got - cause I didn't get all that he apparently did.

Rounding off my weekend, I read some more Evanovich's Stephanie Plum novels. And because I have mental spasms at times, I got to thinking that Evanavich's Plum stories are a little bit on the... uh, demeaning side when it comes to character of Lula. First of all, Lula is a "former 'ho." Second of all, she is fat and sassy & usually has pink or yellow or orange hair. Probably I'm overthinking it. Probably Evanovich just thought Lula up with no hidden meanings. And anyway, the main character, Plum (a white chick), is kind of skanky at times. And anyway again, the writing is good and the books are entertaining. I just need to get over myself sometimes, or write my own damn books and even things out!

So that was the weekend. Now it's Monday (dialysis day) which means we had to get to the clinic by 6:30. Good thing Walmart opens at 6:00 cause I can always pop in and get some stuff done.

Ran into an old acquaintance in WalMart & it was like seeing a ghost. Had heard a long while back that this person had died (by drunk-falling out of a tipped back chair & cracking his skull). See how rumors get started? Came home to check the news and saw something that tells what others think about Palin:

• British minister says Palin is 'horrendous'from www.breitbart.com "Her politics are horrendous, but actually she's struck a chord with people -- 'I'm a maverick, I'm not part of those powerful people' -- and people identified with that."

Then this (more silliness on the local levels):

• from mudflats.wordpress.com Well, if you’ve been like me this evening, you’ve had one eye glued to the “Obama Sign Cam”. Mudflatter ‘poverty kids’ teacher’ has had an Obama sign stolen from the front yard - twice. So, her son set up a live webcam of the sign in hopes of catching the thief in the act.

Since I'm in a sick-of-politics mood (still), the above was the extent of trolling the Net for more... I moved on to something good (as always) from my web buddy, John Baker:

• from John Baker's Blog by john baker

  At the Blue Metropolis International Literary Festival Eleanor Wachtel interviewed the American writer, Lydia Davis. Both of Davis’s parents were writers and her father taught at Columbia University. Wachtel asked her what it was like growing up in that environment:

  It made you very self-conscious. . . But we couldn’t really say anything after a while - I mean after a certain age; I imagine at three I didn’t mind - but at a certain age we couldn’t speak without being aware of how we were saying something, how it was being phrased, as well as what we were saying. So if we made a sort of clumsy repetition, one of them might very well point out, sort of lightly with a smile, but it was a very language saturated household . . .

  . . . my father would consider very carefully what I had said and that made me feel very insecure. I don’t know if this is a good example, but I remembered it just the other day. When he was in the nursing home - you know how you want to say the things that you don’t want to have forgotten to say . . . our family was not, as you can imagine, given to spontaneity - I said to him, “You’ve been a very good father,” I just wanted him to know that, and he said, “In what respect?”

Now my thoughts are all twisted up. I'm thinking about how we sometimes miss part of life by trying to be what others expect (and how sometimes that is a good thing, but somehow it's a bad thing). I'm thinking about how if we just felt free enough to say and do things the best way we know how (no matter what anyone else thinks), we could be so much more for ourselves and for others. I guess this is what makes the great artists, musicians, poets and writers and statesmen great. And I guess this is why there are probably hundreds of people out there with un-shared talents and gifts and thoughts. So many people probably hiding their light under a bushel (is that the term?).

So.

I decided that in addition to ignoring politics for a few days, I'm also going to give up the heavy thoughts. But just for a few days.