**UPDATE** My Walmart Plus Failed

UPDATE:

I recently saw a Reddit post that mentioned the absolute genius of Sony. "The founder of Sony hired an outspoken critic of their products so they could make better products. 20 years later, he became the president of Sony."

Walmart, are you listening? You don't have to hire me. I give my criticism out for free.

Walmart has a membership plan, similar to Amazon Prime. I gave it a try and... boy, what a complete nightmare.

So why get a Walmart Plus membership?

First of all, what made me want the membership was the fact that there was no-minimum free shipping and free local delivery with purchases totaling over $35. About the same for most grocery store plans. Hyvee's Plus plan purchase minimum is lower at $24.99 but the item prices are higher and the store doesn't have the product variety that Walmart does - naturally because, who does besides Amazon? The other thing is that Walmart is a budget-friendly one-stop kind of place to shop. I know there are haters galore but I am a Walmart customer due to finances and my lifestyle limitations.

So.

General Pros and Cons

The no-minimum free shipping of items went well when I used it but I hated taking advantage. I did make some small orders but started trying to be more organized so that I was not ordering one single thing at a time. Besides, even though you can find almost anything for shipping, the product prices get crazy and vary greatly. I'm not paying $30 for a variety bag of potato chip snacks to be shipped when I can get them delivered or in-store for $10.

Now grocery delivery is my jam, as the kids say (said?). I am on such a crazy diet for my sarcoidosis and have such small food storage space that I usually order once every 2 to 3 weeks. Grocery delivery is a convenience for many people but for me, it is a necessity. I don't drive and I live in a tiny town where neighborhood shopping prices are driven by wealthy tourists. I truly rely on grocery delivery from big box stores.

(Side note: recently, I learned that Walmart Plus members can get Paramount Plus also. Well, that is its own nightmare story so I will save it for later.)

The Plus membership taxes my budget because, at $12/95/month plus tax, it is more than a discounted Prime membership. But again, I depend on the delivery services.

So, what went wrong?

I am going to let pictures tell most of the story. Thankfully, I am in the habit of taking screenshots because of cognitive issues. I had to go through the screenshots of the phone app and Twitter messages just to sort out for myself what the hell happened. My Twitter messages shown are in reaction to what's going on with the ordering app and the Walmart site chat reps.

Here goes:

This was the beginning. The first problem order & it was a doozy. It never did arrive & cust svc were as stumped as I about what happened. As you can see, I was actually worried that the delivery driver might have been in an accident.

Keep in mind, I had so many problems with this order that I dang near had to whiteboard the screenshots to sort them out. This one problem was to do with the water I ordered. The shopper removed it from my order as being an "unavailable" item. Funny enough, I was able to go in and add the water to a new cart. Never did get the water or figure out what was up with the unavailability. 

The same order is still a problem the next day. The app shows that the order is still being delivered. The tracking info (I think it showed the driver being 17 minutes away) had not changed overnight.

This phone text is showing nonsense info about an order that a chat rep canceled for me. They canceled it because they thought the app might be glitchy... The word "glitch" got used a lot by the reps and myself.

By the way, this text came in on August 3rd for an order that was made, screwed up, and canceled on the 2nd.

And I realized that part of this crazy, lost, glitchy order included items that were to be shipped rather than driver-delivered. At this point, my brain hurts and, because of my sarc, I'm actually taking handwritten notes to keep track of this mess.

Then I get an app message saying that my order - yeah, that crazy, canceled, lost order - is... delivered.  I have no idea what is going on. I have nothing delivered. A chat rep assured me that the order has been canceled (I was worried about credit card charges) and to go ahead and just start a new order.

 The magic water that keeps appearing and disappearing from stock is still a problem but the chat rep refunded my bad order. I'm still fairly happy at this point, I decide to hang with Walmart for the time being. (That happy feeling won't last.)

 

This is all annoying but I'm still game. I even thanked the chat rep and said that I'd once worked cust svc so "I get it". 

The bossy side of me though can't help but offer some long-winded advice to Walmart. It goes on for several Twitter messages. I won't bore you with it, but I go on for a bit. But back to the nightmare...

With that first bad order all taken care of, I foolishly think things will be better. I place another order. 

This order was made early in the morning to be delivered between 5 & 6 in the evening on the 6th. That did not happen. On the 7th, I got in touch with Walmart. Again. 

 BTW - that whole "We'd like to look into it"? That must be a copy/paste script because they use it every time. Until later, when they stop the fondness for "looking into it"...

They "look into it" and things are fixed. Then they made the mistake of inviting any more concerns - or maybe I made the mistake of taking them up on it.

One of the perks of a Plus membership is a Paramount Plus membership. Of course, I was having problems with mine. Of course.

I won't go into it all but I wasn't able to sign into Paramount. Not on any browser. Not after clearing cookies and cache and waving a magic wand over the computer. But, bless their hearts, they really wanted to help me with it. At this point though, I have Walmart fatigue & I decline.

See how they are almost begging to help with the Paramount issue? That urge to help will fade fast when we get back to problems with the Walmart ordering system...

I can do without Paramount but... Another order and another Walmart screwup. My new order is going to be delayed. Of course. Because a delay usually signals a biggre problem, I get proactive in alerting Walmart:

Late doesn't bother me. Getting another weird system glitch is what worries me.

Am I a pest for being concerned at this point?

Nope, I am not a pest. I am apparently psychic. This order is also turning out to be a problem. The order is late and the browser is not updating and neither is the app on my phone. I try cancelling to avoid another hours long delivery failure nightmare.

As usual, the chat agent is amazing and is able to get the order cancelled. However, even the agent is curious about the "glitch". He is very sorry and encouraged me to try placing the order all over again. I decide I will try that.

When I mention that I am going to try again but am wondering if it will work this time, Walmart pulls their old copy/paste "reach out" message... They want me to provide them with past order info. As if they cannot scroll back through all these messages.

I give them the problem order numbers. I provide them with a maddening screenshot of a particuarly weird that happened. An order shows on the app as both delivered and cancelled. It's like magic.

At this point, I am done. Walmart is mysteriously not responding to the provided info - info that they requested. 

They just ghost me. So I let them know that I am cancelling the order and cancelling my Plus membership.

Here is how bad that "glitching" of their system is. The chat rep now goes into "forwarding" the problem to a "team". I'm just over it at this point.

 

There are more screenshots but, at this point, I have a headache. I made sure that I canceled my membership and made sure that all charges were refunded back to the original payment method. Then I immediately went back and resumed my InstaCart membership. That's only $10 per month. Sure, I will have to InstaCart shop between Hyvee, Aldi's, Target, and the other stores but at least I won't have to work an unpaid part-time job of fixing Walmart delivery problems.

One funny thing to mention is that, before their Plus program, Walmart was one of the InstaCart shops. I guess they think they can do a better job with Plus. Good luck with that.

When I canceled my Plus membership, I still had 20 days left to use it. I tried doing a couple of shipping orders but, because of the crazy pricing, Amazon was cheaper. And more reliable.

So, as I mentioned to Walmart in the Twitter messages, I wrote a blog post about this epic failure. I will send them a link but they haven't been responding to me for a while. Their problem is in not listening to customers. One of the suggestions I made to them was to have someone take a look at how InstaCart works from a customer POV. I doubt they did that.

Peace

--Free

P.S.: I'm too weary to look it up, but I did tweet out that Walmart failed me. They did the "reach out" thing & I reminded them that they were ignoring me. So they... ignored me. You have to laugh.

Introverts & Love & Laughter

 I joined a subreddit for introverts and I'm here for the humor. I am what my friends call a randomly social introvert. If I like you, if I love you, I'll come out of my shell for you. But even then, I need my space. 

The late (and wonderfully funny) Patrice O'Neal was the male me. My last husband was not the best but I loved that he understood me. Take it, Patrice:

I will probably never be in another relationship. Unless I find my Patrice.

Peace

--Free

A Life Without Purses

 Some people are going to hate me for this but...

How do men live without purses? They do, of course, but I just don't understand how.

For me, carrying a purse is only a fashion statement because there are such cute purses. Mainly, I carry a purse because I wouldn't be able to live comfortably without doing so. If there were no cute purses and I couldn't make a cute purse, I'd carry a sack filled with smaller sacks.

Some women say they can't live without cute shoes or a certain perfume. I can but don't want to live without a purse. It doesn't have to be fancy, pricey, trendy, high-end, or on one of those must-have lists. It only needs to suit my needs for the day. I have thrift-shop purses, designer purses, purses that I was given, purses I traded for, and purses that I inherited.  

If I had to leave my house with just what I could carry in my hands, I would need many pairs of hands. I'd be carrying that sack of sacks or wearing clothes with huge pockets.

Men like to joke about women and their purses. Until they need something. They know that we could survive a 10-day car trip with just what's in our purses. A few years ago, while on a road trip with my family, I rode in the car with one of my brothers. When he cut his hand checking a tire, I had bandaids. When he wanted gum, I had it. He wanted tissue to clean the top of his soda can. Had it. After finding in my bag the fifth or sixth thing he needed, he called my Rosetti the clown car purse. He can laugh all he wants but he wouldn't have survived 5 hours in the car without me and my bag.

I really do marvel at how a man can leave the house with just his wallet and keys. I need, at minimum:

• tissues
• hand wipes
• antibacterial gel
• face mask
• lotion (regular and extra moisturizing)
• lip balm (the really good kind that costs too much and the cheap kind for when I don't want to waste the really good kind)
• hair barrettes
• reading glasses
• 
  sunglasses
• portable phone chargers (I have two because one might run out of juice)
• USB C charging cable (for my phone)
• USB B (for my earbud case)
• gum and breath mints
• hard candy
• perfume (for day)
• perfume (for evening)
• perfume (for day & evening)
• face cream
• sunscreen
• small tin of deodorant (he-ey Tussy!)
• pantyliners
• bandaids
• eyedrops
• vitamins, aspirin, and cold tabs
• Benadryl tablets and Benadryl cream
• small bottle of top coat nail polish
• tube of Manuka honey for blemishes, burns, and cuts
• small tube of hair gel (to tame those edges)
• compact mirror
• blotting tissues
• small notebook and pen
• vape pen, vape juice, and vape batteries

Oh - and my wallet. I love those slimline designs because they don't take up a lot of room. I mean, you just have to be prepared.

$8 from Poshmark

I once had to catch a plane to get to my family when there was an illness. I had an hour to pack a small piece of luggage and get to the airport across town. I made the plane with a pair of sneakers, a pair of dress flats, a pair of heels, 2 changes of clothing, 3 days' change of underwear, and my trusty purse. I had no problems looking decent, smelling nice, and dealing with my headaches.

On TV, they talk about bugout bags. I don't have time for all that. My purse is the only "go" bag I need. And it usually is a cute one with a shoulder strap and handles. 

There are days when I still tear up thinking about the handbags I had to leave behind when I moved here. I made sure they all went to good homes. Their new owners update me from time to time on how well the bags are doing. There was one leather bag that I gave to a really good friend. She had it died and reconditioned so, after 5 years, it's looking almost better than new.

If I had money, I would own as many purses as my closet or a spare room could hold. Alas, I'm stuck with very little leftover money after bills. Thank God for Poshmark, eBay, and Mercari. And that little thrift store I used to frequent back before the pandemic. I can't wait until they get back into full swing.

Usually, I carry basic bags - no visible advertising for a hoity-toity designer - and I don't mind. As long as they are sturdy and not ugly, I'm happy. My go-to bag for the past several months has been a Leibskind (or, and LB, as my friend calls it)  that I snagged off Poshmark for under $30. 

It's vintage and probably sold new for around $300 or $400. I can't believe people pay that much for a bag. Well, the old lady me can't believe it. The younger me once spent $500 for a bag. I still regret that to this day.  It was an ugly Dooney & Burke bag that looked like something a Victorian-era doctor would carry.

I can literally pack to travel with this bag  - the LB, I mean. And I actually have. I once took a day trip with nothing but this bag and a change of clothes I packed in with my laptop in its case. True story. 

When I was married (the first time), I didn't mind when I had to carry his keys and extras in my bag. This was during the heyday of that fashion wart called the "fanny pack" and sure didn't want him rocking that thing. (I actually have one myself now but, I'm old and single so I'm allowed.) My second husband never remembered to carry anything. I had to always hand him the keys so he didn't walk out without them...

So I have to admire (or feel sorry for) men who can live without a purse. I don't know how they do it - especially if they are single or have a woman who putzes around with one of those dainty little only-for-show bags. Ugh.

Men, I need to know your secret.

Peace

--Free

Midlife Reality Check

 So I am not only officially middle-aged in years (if I live to be 122!) but... I am dang near elderly according to the mirror.

The other day, I was leaving the bathroom after putting away some towels. On my way out, I happened to glance in the mirror and, for maybe a millisecond, I wondered who was looking back at me. Seriously.

It's not as if I've aged overnight. I know that I reached my probable middle age when I hit just past the age of 37. If I'm lucky enough to live that long. I am very much aware of my age and I have been noticing the subtle changes since I turned 50  - the strands of grey at my temples, fine lines across my brow, and the ones that bracket my smile. Also, a few years ago, I noticed the beginnings of a double chin. God help me and curse all the carbs I so love.

I know how very blessed I am to see the age of 61. I have friends and family who did not see too far past this milestone. So, I'm fine with the extra pounds and lines. What shocked me was the aging I saw in my eyes. They are less sparkly and gleeful. I don't have dark circles but my eyes look a bit weary.

When did that happen?

Every life - even a good one, I am sure - wears on the soul. I've had quite a few big losses and hurts that knocked me for a loop. Those made me stronger.  What I realize now is that it's the little things that wear on my optimism like little drips of water can eat away at stones.

Once upon a time, nothing could keep the smile off my face and out of my eyes for very long. Once I finished grieving and mourning the loss of a job, a relationship, or even a loved one, I could find a reason to get back my smile. I'd realize that I could find a better job. I would tell myself that not every relationship works out. When I finished mourning a loved one, I would always, always, always remember something beautiful that helped me through the grief. But those little things...

I have too much anxiety for a normal life. I'm pretty sure my anxiety about everything I can find to be anxious about is the cause of what I see in the mirror lately.

Not only do I have anxiety but I have depression and, then there are all my other little weirdities. 

My mother used to say that I was much too sensitive and could make a mountain out of a molehill. Well, I have matured to the point of being able to make even bigger mountains. If I get in the right mood, I can make the Brooks Range look like wannabe hills.

Being sensitive (and anxious and depressed) is bad enough but I am prone to overthinking everything. Ever-ree-thing.

Anyway, I have decided to try to polish that sparkle in my eyes. I am really going to fight against overthinking so much. Also, I am going to make a habit to counter my anxiety attacks with positive reminders - blessings, friends, happy thoughts. If all else fails, I will ask my doctor to up the dosage of my meds.

Peace

--Free

Stretching Away the Blues

That deep, funky blue cloud of depression that was hanging over me has started to dissipate. Finally. 

I realize that a lot of my physical and mental problems are caused by the higher than normal amount of stress I've been under. Between being depressed and the methotrexate making me sicker than usual, I spent way too much time in bed -especially the last week. One of the things that motivated me to get up was a video channel I found on YouTube. The host does stretching exercises - non-Yoga stretching, to be specific. (Christians recognize that Yoga is based on and rooted in another religion.)

This woman is pregnant in the first videos I tried following along with. Perfect. I'm old and out of shape. Her gentle nighttime stretching exercises were just what I needed to get started. And the stretching worked. I didn't realize just how tight my body was until I began to unkink the muscles. I slept relaxed that first night instead of just passing out from sustained misery.

I haven't yet worked up to doing the Full Body Morning Stretch - baby steps, people! 

By the way, it is not only my opinion that Yoga is, if not a religion, a spiritual practice. As a Christian, I don't practice anything spiritual outside of my faith. For a further explanation of why I do not and will not practice Yoga, you can check this post. Or not.

Anyway. That is why I choose non-Yoga stretching.

The other thing I did to help pull myself out of my depression was to give myself a break from my strict renal diet. Just for a few days. (My nephrologist thinks I could loosen up a bit with the diet anyway.) For the past few days, I have been adding broccoli and collard greens to my meals. I really indulged when I made the collards and added a piece of smoked turkey wing. Later today, I am going to have some pinto beans and hot water cornbread. 

So, yeah, the blue cloud is lifting. Hopefully, after my infusion next week, I will feel even better. Oh, and a couple of perfume decants I've wanted to try arrived in the mail. Not thrilled with either of them but they will be fun to review at some point.

from the House of Oud

Anyway. I'm back - or trying to be. 

Peace

--Free

Clean Smarter (and Cheaper)

This article reminded me of when I learned about the expensive LemiShine products I used for cleaning. I liked the way LemiShine products worked to clean laundry and dishes in spite of the hard water here where I  live. I did not like the prices. When I bothered to read the ingredient lists on each product, I realized the main one was citric acid.

Buying citric acid powder in bulk is much cheaper than purchasing the various LemiShine (and other brands) cleaning products. The powder can be added to water for spraying and cleaning whatever I want. I can use as little or as much of the powder itself as a laundry booster, dishwasher cleaner, or whatever. The two main ways I use the powder? To clean my coffee pots and the mineral deposits around the faucets. I also sprinkle a little into the toilet bowl once a week to soak and flush away that nasty-looking brown line of hard-water stain. 

What I never considered until recently are all the other products I could replace with some basic (and bulk) ingredients. 

Oxi Clean is my go-to alternative to bleach - especially for cleaning clothing. I now know that the main ingredient in that is Sodium Percarbonate. 

So this is just a quickie post to let you know about these base ingredients in case you want to do your own research. I will be on the prowl for more info so that I can keep saving money - and perhaps being a little healthier - when cleaning. 

Here are some links I am going to be checking out:

• More here About Cleaning Product Ingredients
• 10 Ingredients In Homemade Cleaners
• Homemade Cleaners You Can Make with Ingredients from Your Pantry
• From Healthy Cleaning 101 - Types of Household Cleaning Products

Peace

--Free

The Best Moisturizer (If You Can Afford It)

 A long while back - maybe as far as 9 or 10 months ago - I got a package in the mail with a full-sized trial of Dermalogica Melting Moisture Masque. It was part of some promotion that I might have signed up for and forgotten about. At any rate, I tried the product, found it kind of heavy and oily, and put it away. And forgot about it.

Thank you whoever for this
lovely full-sized product

Back in July, when I had used up my Loreal Age Perfect and the weather here was getting too humid for using any of my several pure oils - Babassu, Marula, coconut, Sesame, Olives, etc. - as a facial moisturizer, I reached for the Dermalogica again. And let me tell you something...

This is the best moisturizer I have ever used. It goes on slightly oily but, true to its name, it just melts into your skin. 

This is the amount I tested on the back of my hand

This is how it looks melted by body warmth.

This is a few moments after I rubbed the oil into my skin

The very first time I used it, I purposely used the tiniest dab because I wanted to see what it felt like. That tiny dab turned out to be enough to moisturize my whole jawline and cheek. Because it did feel oily at first, I was trying to dab it around the rest of my face so that the oil wouldn't be so concentrated. And I stopped there to do what I should have done first: read the label. 

Huh. So I was supposed to blot this? Well, I didn't and, after the couple of moments it took to read the label, I realized no blotting was needed. The masque had truly melted totally into my skin. My face felt amazing - very supple and kind of velvety. There was only the very slightest sheen as a sign of the oil. A nice sheen, healthy and natural, not oily and acne-prone.

Right away I made up my mind that I was going to switch from everything else to this product as my go-to moisturizer.

My niece happened to call while I was still admiring how nice my face felt. I told her about the masque. She said she wasn't sure but that she thought that Dermalogica was kind of a pricey brand. I said that it couldn't be that pricey because someone had sent me this bottle free in the mail. She laughed and said to go check Amazon. So I did. And child!

That might not faze some people but I heard my wallet screech a little when I saw the price. I told my niece and she wanted to know if I'd really gotten a full-sized product. I double-checked and, yep, for months, I'd had a bottle of liquid gold just sitting unused in my bathroom cabinet...

Sixty-five dollars is really a lot for me to spend on a face moisturizer. I've gotten tight-fisted in the past when I've had to spend around twenty bucks to re-stock the L'Oreal Age Perfect. I once even got a little mad when the drug store raised the price of Babassu Oil to almost eight dollars.

But.

This moisturizer is so good even in such a small amount that I could see myself wanting to buy more. I've been using it almost all summer and the bottle still seems to be mostly full. It's hard to tell because the covering is opaque but it does feel full to me. Anyway, all I need is a couple of dabs in the morning and a couple at night. I should be able to get at least another couple of months' worth of dabs. It's definitely worth the price. I go through the 1.2-ounce jar of Age Perfect every couple of months.

I think what I like most about this Melting Masque is that I get the benefits of an oil-based moisturizer without the oil sitting on top of my skin. The one other oil that is good this way is Marula oil but it's hard to find a good quality brand. The one brand I love tends to be unavailable on a regular basis. And pure Marula oil is not cheap. Also, for some reason - probably hormonal - my skin does not always love Marula.

Maybe I will have to save up so that I can re-stock this Melting Masque. I could do that on a once-a-year basis. I'll be happily sliding into my 62nd year next June. I'm not body vain so I don't mind being a little more, um "plump" but if I do not want dry skin. Not on my body or my face. I just wish good facial moisturizers were as affordable as body lotions...

Anyway, if you ever heard of this Dermalica and balked at the price, I can tell you that my broke a** thinks it's worth it.

Peace

--Free

But wait! There's more:

Weirdly, the ingredients list for this masque is a combination of some of the oils I use individually. I'm not sure why the product is so much more absorbent than when I use those oils separately. Maybe it's due to the additional items listed or the blending process. Straight from Dermalogica, here is the list of ingredients with a caveat:

Butyrospermum Parkii (Shea) Butter, Caprylic/Capric Triglyceride, C10-18 Triglycerides, Mangifera Indica (Mango) Seed Oil, C13-15 Alkane, Hydrogenated Olive Oil Stearyl Esters, Jojoba Esters, Linoleic Acid, Glyceryl Stearate, Helianthus Annuus (Sunflower) Seed Wax, Helianthus Annuus (Sunflower) Seed Oil, Tribehenin, Oryza Sativa (Rice) Bran Extract, Butyrospermum Parkii (Shea) Butter Extract, Helianthus Annuus (Sunflower) Extract, Lavandula Angustifolia (Lavender) Oil, Lavandula Hybrida Oil, Acacia Decurrens Flower Wax, Rosmarinus Officinalis (Rosemary) Leaf Extract, Citrus Limon (Lemon) Peel Oil, Rosmarinus Officinalis (Rosemary) Leaf Oil, Glycine Soja (Soybean) Oil, Silica Silylate, Glycol Distearate, Salvia Sclarea (Clary) Oil, Plankton Extract, Bixa Orellana Seed Oil, Glycol Stearate, Hydroxyacetophenone, Tocopheryl Acetate, Polyglycerin-3, Tocopherol, Water/Aqua/Eau, Linolenic Acid, Oleic Acid, Palmitic Acid, Stearic Acid, Behenic Acid, Arachidic Acid, Gondoic Acid, Geraniol, Citral, Linalool, Limonene

Dermalogica is dedicated to maintaining the accuracy of the ingredient lists on this website. However, because ingredients are subject to change, we cannot guarantee that these lists are complete, up-to-date and/or error-free. For an accurate listing of ingredients in each product, please refer to your product packaging.

(I highlighted the oils that I use or have used individually at some point)

By the way, I've thought about who might have sent this product to me and I am now almost sure that I filled out a form online somewhere for the freebie. But in thinking about buying more, I found that by subscribing to the product on the brand's website, I would get free shipping and a gift. So that's an option.

Taking a Little Break (To Reboot)

 My depression and anxiety have ramped up in the past couple of weeks. This is a cycle, I know, and I know it will run its course. For now, I am just struggling to deal with the most minor things. I'm pretty sure my sarcoidosis is in cahoots with the mental issues because my brain gets even sillier at times like this.

I'm going to take a little time away from blogging. Maybe in a week or two, I will be better. I have an infusion coming up so I should definitely feel physically better after that. For now, I have been mainly avoiding people and trying not to sleep too much by browsing memes about depression and anxiety. It all makes me very tired.

When I come back, I will share some CKD-friendly recipes on my kidney blog and try to do a couple of perfume reviews here since one of my nieces sent me a couple.

Praying that all the readers are doing well. I'll leave you with some memes to make you smile a little and inspirational thoughts to make you think.

Peace

--Free

P.S.: If you suffer from anxiety and/or depression, talk to a doctor - or to anyone who can help you. There is treatment and it works. I sometimes have to have my dosage adjusted. This happens to be one of those times and I do have an appointment coming up. Whatever you do, do not think you are the only one, and do not lose hope. Do not give up and do not give in.

This is so me.

And I need to buy a sticker like this for my front door:

This. So much this:

**UPDATE** Using the Ninja Creami (3 Weeks In)

 It's been almost 4 weeks since I got this Ninja Creami. I have until the 17th of this month (August) to decide whether or not to return it. Even though I initially thought I'd definitely keep it, I did look at my budget and waffle a bit. Now I'm leaning toward keeping it. And since my scattered brain just now remembered that I have not yet posted the initial review so here you go. Now I can link to the method I use to determine whether or not to keep an appliance...

Is the Creami a Keep It or a Sleep It? I'm really, really leaning toward keeping it. I do use this think at least twice a week. And I did get it at one of the best prices of the year. So, yeah, I'm probably keeping it. The only reason I would send it back at this point is if I suddenly found something better and cheaper. (I looked at machines like this one but... I'm turning into a Ninja fan.)

In just under 4 weeks, I have made pint after pint of non- or low-dairy ice cream, sorbet, and gelato. I have only had one real dud. One of my base mixes was off somehow and my product came out like powder. All the re-spinning in the world did not help. I gave up on that one and rinsed a couple of buck's worth of ingredients down the disposal.

If you have looked into getting a Creami, you have no doubt wondered or heard about how loud the machine runs. It scared me the first time I ran it but, as I mentioned in the initial post, I keep mine on a thick cloth pad and this is what it sounds like:

I have to say that I really do enjoy being able to make gelato customized to my tastes and health needs. The first time I made one, I bypassed eggs and used cornstarch instead. It was okay. Not amazing, not bad, just okay. Then I found a recipe using eggs without any cooking. Perfect. Even minus the custard base, that gelato was pretty dang smacking, if I say so myself. One day, I will go ahead a do a custard base, just because.

Mainly, I have been using macadamia milk but I've started using cashew milk and adding some coconut cream to it in place of heavy cream. (At the end of this post, I will tell you something embarrassing.) I have to say that I prefer using cashew milk. It's much creamier and, if I whip or froth it, it get super-thick and makes for a better ice cream base. Of course, I found out a few months ago that I am slightly allergic to cashew milk. I can eat cashews until I'm broke but the milk? If I drink more than a couple of cups, it makes my skin itch. Hives? Is that what that is? Anyway. Funny that cashew nuts and store-bought cashew milk ice cream don't bother me one bit.

By the way, this is how thick cashew milk froths up for use in my coffee...

One thing I have not played around with is adding things beyond a little chocolate syrup. I keep intending to thaw some blueberries to toss in but I always forget. I do have some canned pineapple (one of the CKD-safe fruits) that I'm going to stir into the next batch of ice cream. Years ago, I heard on one of the Food Network shows about garlic ice cream. I do love me some garlic so... maybe???

So, after a few weeks, I can definitely speak on a couple of frustrations with the Creami. For one thing, it can be tricky to make the just-right batch of the base when using dairy substitutes. Even with all this practice, I still have to watch every measurement carefully to avoid getting ice crystals or a slushy result. Also, products made in the Creami melt very quickly. I am going to look into solutions for that. because I don't often have anyone to share the desserts with, I have to re-freeze leftovers. It's not horrible but it's not ideal.

Another thing is that I have to remember to date-mark my pints. It takes a minimum of 24 hours of freezing before you can run a batch in the machine. Now that I have 3 of the pint and lid sets, I keep batches in rotation. If I forget to mark them, I have no idea when I put them in so I have to leave them at least a few hours more. Anyway.

Over the past few weeks, I've remembered to take photos of some of the processes and results - missteps and all.

There was one batch that barely filled up the pint. After the fact, I realized that, once again, I'd screwed up on the measurement. I now know not to try talking on the phone while I'm measuring.

Adding a little bit of chocolate syrup was genius. I didn't add it until after the ice cream was served. The Creami can be picky about things you add when using the machine...

This was my first batch of soft serve. Soft by accident. I have no idea what I did to this base but... It was pretty tasty. My neighbor complains that I need to add more sugar and fat. Uh, girlfriend, go get your own machine and do your thing.

My first really good batch

So, yeah. I do like having this machine. In a while, after I see the dentist, I'm going to be doing soft foods for a while. So... ice cream anyone? 

This next week, I am going to try a garlic recipe that I found. I'm kind of mad that I'm so dairy-restricted. Otherwise, I'd use this lady's recipe all the damn time to make this no-churn ice cream. Her batch looks scrumptious! 

Later today, I am going to make some ice cream using cream of coconut. Why? Well, about that embarrassing thing I promised to tell... I've been using cashew milk and a tiny bit of table cream whipped to substitute for heavy cream.  I broke down though and decided to try using coconut cream (I've used coconut milk and it's delicious). When I went to the Walmart site to order the coconut cream, I saw that it was ridiculously pricey. The cheapest can (just about 14 ounces) is $4.38. For one can. So, of course, I kept scrolling. I spotted the price of $2.34 and the words "coconut" and "cream" and added a can to my cart. Well, when I opened the can, I knew I'd messed up. Here's a For Dummies tip: coconut cream and cream of coconut are two totally different things. And they are not interchangeable in recipes...

What I got

What I have

What I NEED

If my mother were here, my name for the day would be "idiot" while she "blessed my heart"...

I will get the cream of coconut and give the recipe a whirl. In the meantime, I am still loving the Creami. Mostly.

Peace

--Free

**REVIEW** Ninja Creami Ice Cream Machine

 So. I found such a good deal on this ice cream matching that I returned the Woot computer. Well, I also returned it because I think Woot had played a little loose with the discount value. It looks to me that they over-estimated the sticker price to make their discount look deeper than it actually was. I decided, no thank you, I will keep looking...

Anyway.

Talk about good timing. The Ninja Creami deal happened during Prime Day.

I use all except
 for the Lite. Lite? No thank you.

Because I have the Amazon Prime Rewards Visa Signature Card, I was able to get the machine for under $140, making 6 no-interest payments. If not for that, I would not have the Creami. (My niece has the Creami but she got the 3-pint model vs the 1-pint I bought and she paid around $235. Yikes. The 1-pint I got on discount is currently $200.) Even when I bought mine with the Prime Day discount, I made up my mind to use what I call my "Keep It or Sleep It" system. It's a simple system. If, after a week or two, I find that I am not getting much use from the appliance, I return it. Very simple. 

This is what my first-week experience was with the Creami:

• Day 1 - I was still slightly med-sick when it was delivered so it just sat, boxed, in the living room for the morning. I spent half an hour that evening, unboxing it and wondering why the heck I'd bought it in the first place. I took the manual and Quick Start paperwork to bed and watched some video reviews.

• Day 2 Part 1 - The machine is big and heavy, but not as big and heavy as I'd feared. I have minimal counter space but this fits on my one near the sink. It is too heavy for me to be moving back and forth to a storage spot in the pantry or closet if I use it more than 3 times a week. If I don't use it 3 times a week or more, then I need to "sleep" it. The set-up is super easy because there is nothing to do but plug it in, and attach the blade paddle to the lid. And you don't need to do any of that until you make your ice cream base but we'll get to that.

• Day 2 Part 2 - I had to decide what I wanted to make. The big thing with the Creami is that you have to make and freeze your base mix for at least 24 hours. This isn't too bad for my niece who had 3 of the pint cups and storage lids. My machine came with a single cup/lid set. That's kind of an important difference. For my first go-round with the machine, I made a modified version of the basic ice cream recipe I saw in the recipe book and online. I can't have a lot of dairy products so I used macadamia milk, a little bit of heavy table cream, natural honey as the sweetener, cornstarch (because of this tip), and vanilla bean paste. I whipped this up, making sure to add as much air as I could, poured it into the pint, lidded it, and put it at the back of my freezer. (I wrote down the time that the mix went into the freezer.)

• Day 3 Part 1 - It was a couple of hours over the 24-hour limit before I remembered to take out the base mix. For some reason, I was really nervous to actually run the Creami for the first time. I checked and re-checked that I'd correctly (and tightly) attached the paddle/blade to the lid. I practiced inserting putting the pint and bowl together and getting them inserted into the machine. I put the mix back in the freezer and spent an hour watching more videos to make sure I understood the procedure. I spent another hour having a cup of coffee and contemplating whether or not to just send the machine back to Amazon. When the mix had been in the freezer for a total of almost 30 hours, I finally took the plunge. I inserted the bowl, turned on the power, and had a mild anxiety attack when the lights on the machine started doing their thing. I hit Ice Cream and - OH MY LORD! This thing sounds like my vacuum when I've got something stuck in the brush. It's very jarring. Thankfully, the Ice Cream process isn't long - maybe 2 minutes, tops? 

          Okay. That should be all the payback I need to dish out to my loud-assed neighbor upstairs!                   She really gets on my nerves up there, walking like she's trying to wake the dead but... I felt a                 little bad for my other neighbors. (I came up with a solution I will mention shortly.) 

           But - I had ice cream! It was a little bit slushy/icy at first so I did a Re-spin and it was much                     better-looking and it tasted amazing. I was glad that I'd added cream and vanilla paste. 

• Day 3 Part 2 - I put what was left of my first batch of ice cream into another container to keep in the freezer. I wanted to try making a sorbet. I made a mix of canned peaches (in heavy syrup), some vanilla bean paste, and about a tablespoon of honey. I pureed this with the immersion blender and put it up to freeze. 
• Day 5 - I had doctor appointments so I did not use the sorbet mix right away. When I did, it was also super-easy. Just hit the Sorbet button on the Creami and let it work. Honestly, I think my sorbet was much better than the ice cream. 

At the end of the 2 weeks, in addition to making the first ice cream and sorbet (I made that twice and shared it with one of my neighbors), I tried my hand at a gelato (without custard), and a completely dairy-free version of ice cream. 

I have to say, my least favorite thing was the dairy-free ice cream. I think ice cream needs more fat. Also, I wasn't using anything in place of the cream cheese.

So. The Creami is definitely a Keep It for me. I went back over the last several months of my Instacart and Walmart receipts to see how much I've spent on non-dairy ice cream. I also thought about the things I've had to replace my ice cream and yogurt cravings with. And I realized how few snack items I can enjoy on this specialized diet. 

This is a keeper FOR ME - however... In my opinion, there are people this might not be for. Unless you can afford even the bargain price - 

• DON'T get this if you don't have a special diet to stick to - where you need a lot of control or ingredients.
• DON'T get this if you have more than 3 people in the home who will use it enough. Even with 3 pints and lids, it's tough to satisfy every craving. That 24-hour wait is crazy. As a single person, I was able to deal with this. I can't eat a pint at a time so I made enough over a few days to freeze and nibble on daily. I went ahead and got 2 extra pints and lids ($20) and now can rotate mixes.
• DON'T get this if you aren't going to use at least 3 of the 7 functions (I'm including the ingredients "Mix In" function to the others) I am using Ice Cream, Sorbet, Gelato, and Smoothie Bowl (this one only once so far).

The pros and cons - again in my opinion:

• PRO - This is interesting: the design is a modified-for-home-use version of the $7k Pacojet used in industrial & commercial kitchens. And that info is from a pro.
• PRO - Very useful for people needing ingredient control (especially kids who can't handle sugar or who have allergies).
• PRO - SO easy to clean. I have been running my parts under warm & soapy water, doing a good rinse, and drying - all by hand. It takes maybe 5 minutes at most.
• PRO - Easy to set up and use. Even a child (depending) can be taught to use this. It's fairly safe because the blade/paddle is not exposed during use. The blade is not very sharp even when exposed for cleaning.
• PRO - It doesn't take long to learn how to substitute ingredients to achieve a good taste and texture of the frozen goodies.
• CON - The machine is loud. So loud. (I did manage to muffle the sound by quite a bit by placing the machine on a piece of thick silicone padding. I even used a thick towel after the first time and that also worked. Just make sure the machine stays level and sturdy - you know, use common sense.)
• CON - Even for a single person, having only 1 pint is pesky. You cannot set up more than one - or one type of - treat with 1 pint. I now have 3 containers so that I can have treats in rotation or just ready if I want them on the fly. (NOTE: Be careful shopping for extra pints. Go for the Ninja brand. Not all off-brand pints are for use in the machine; some are only for storage.) 
• CON - No matter how you muffle the sound of the machine, you won't want to run it at night unless you don't share walls/ceilings with neighbors.
• CON - The price. Unless your circumstances really warrant it, the price is still too high. There are $60 machines out there. I thought about getting one of the bucket-type machines but they have their own drawbacks. Still, you should do comparisons. The other machines are better for making more ice cream (I'm talking gallons) and if you have the space, they would be the better option in my opinion.

I've said this before about the Foodi and it applies to the Creami: if you are going to use this enough and if you can find a really decent discount on the price, yes, it's worth it. Personally, I would never buy something like this if not for finding a good price and no-interest financing. It's good and it's fun but, even for the ingredient control, this wouldn't be worth it on my budget otherwise.

Finally, all this buy-or-not info is just my opinion. You need to do your own research and make your own decision.

Peace

--Free

P.S.: I was writing a blog post on whether or not to keep the Creami when I realized that I had not posted this yet! So I am rush-publishing this, hoping that it doesn't need any editing. If so, mea culpa.