Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Honoring Mom

Thinking about my mother and how I believe that we, as a family, children she raised, have let her down in so many ways.

Mom was the strength that held us together, made us want to love each other, mended rifts between us, kept us brothers and sisters, made us better parents, aunts and uncles. Now that she is gone, it's as though we have forgotten all that she taught us about being a family, love and respect and compassion.

\With all that she taught us, Mom should have been able to leave us knowing that we wouldn't forget or  put aside all those lessons, but we have. With her gone, there is nothing holding  us together, nothing keeping  us respectful of the elder ones and watchful over the younger ones. The older ones aren't passing along the basic manners and principles of respect, and the younger ones are not willing to remember or learn.

It makes me sad to think how disappointed Mom would be.

All I can do is keep honoring her by being the way she was and by dealing with things the way she would have. It's hard, but I'd rather keep honoring her than to forget, even though that would make things easier sometimes.

If your parents are still with you, listen to their lessons now. Start teaching the young people why those lessons are important and not to be discarded as they begin to think of themselves as "grown." Etch the wisdom of your parents in your heart now so that you will be saved a lot of grief later.

Remember that some things don't go out of fashion: manners, respect for elders, compassion for youth, family bonds and parental wisdom, If you forget this, one day you will  have children and learn what heartaches can be caused by the lack of these things.


Early Resolutions

Most folks wait until January to list their New Year resolutions, but, as you all can tell, I have been slowly working on mine for the last several months. I guess I can't call what I've come up with "resolutions" since those are usually things people intend or hope to do. I've come up with changes I've already made or am definitely making. (Matter of fact, I added one to the list after a wasted evening out: In other words, I won't be doing the family dinners out anymore.There was nothing in it for me to enjoy, so I would  have done better to go out with a friend. With a friend, I would  have had mutual conversation and something to look back on later as being pleasant. Tonight cost me money that could have been better spent and was a complete waste of time for me. If my mother were here, I think even she would tell me the same thing.)

So, other than that, here is the main list. *drum roll please* I resolve to:

  • Know that God made me for and intends good things for me no matter what the present is like.
  • Grow my faith more.
  • Stop doing anything that doesn't make me feel right. No more "go along to get along" or "grin and bear it." 
  • Start respecting myself no matter whether other people have the decency to do so or not.
  • Spend more time and attention on those in my life who add joy and love. Less time and thought on those who don't. (I'm thinking of 3 dear friends who I've neglected a little)
  • Find a way to express my creativity again. If this disease killed my writing ability, there is still something I can do. I need to find that and do it.
  • Make plans to live more happily independent from family. I've been too close to them and need to concentrate on me and my happiness. That will let me enjoy the time I do spend with them more.
  • Pray more every day. Spend real time on my spiritual life. Reading the Bible and going to church.
  • Join a support group for this disease.
  • Learn something new this year - an art or a technology.
  • Return to keeping a paper and pen journal.
  • Start a collection of stones. I might even make a hobby of collecting and polishing them. It's something I've wanted to do for years and never did.

And there are some that I know are typical: stop smoking, lose weight, etc. LOL.

I wonder what kinds of resolutions other people make. Not the ones they tell everyone about, but the ones that really mean something special to them. Hmmm.

Anyway, I am planning to be a stronger person in the coming year. I'm am already making inroads.

Here's to 2012 and the next however many years God grants me of life.