Tuesday, April 23, 2013

I Believe Fat Meat's Greasy

Growing up, I heard my mom use a particular saying for someone (me) who was stubborn or "hard-headed."

If I made a mistake once, Mom would hug me and tell me to learn from it. If I made that same mistake a couple times over, Mom would give me the side-eye and say, "You don't believe fat meat's greasy."

The saying also applied when I knew I was making a mistake, but just didn't want to believe it. Like when I trusted the wrong "friend," or tried to convince myself that the ground was Up and the sky was Down. (Or that Mama wouldn't know that I was lying about something...)

I don't know what it says about me as a person that I only learned a few years back to be more cautious in my life.

Until I got my little heart broken real good, I believed that if someone told you they loved you, they meant it. I didn't think that person would lie to you or cheat on you. I thought that if someone said "I love you," they knew how to love. It took getting hurt to learn that, while every one of us wants to be loved, the love we need is not all the same.

Last evening, I got a call from an old friend. There was a time that my heart would have jumped right out of my chest at the sound of his voice. I'm not that person anymore. I've grown past anything I could have had with him. Now, if he had been ready for me way back when... Well, two people can be together and grow apart, but they can't grow together, apart. If you know what I mean.

I talked to my old friend and it was nice, but I won't be hearing from him anymore. What he has to give now doesn't apply to who I am today. Probably, he was a mistake back then and I just didn't know better. I am learning, though. At least now I know and believe that fat meat's greasy.


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