Monday, January 07, 2013

What IS Chemistry Anyway?

You know, I haven't been a bitch for  minute, so I have some making up to do... Today's post is all about the mystery of physical attraction. Heat, chemistry, whatever. I don't understand it at all. Apparently none of my close friends get it either. I was talking to a couple of the girlfriends tonight after we heard a Bobby Brown song on the radio. What the heck is the "It" thing that some people have and others lack? You know the "thing" I'm talking about. The thing that makes you drool out of lust or out of disgust. What is that?

There are the folks who, no matter who they are or what they do, they are never going to be the type of people who can even seem nice or kind or sweet or... sexy. Just like there are people who are not attractive by most standards, but are so freaking hot.

There's Edward James Olmos and Lawrence Fishburne - not what most women think of as heart-stoppingly handsome - yet, they can speak or move in a certain way that just makes a woman want to throw her drawers over a lampshade and lose her morals. (William DeVane, when he played on "Knot's Landing" did that for me. Damn, how I used to want that man!)

Then... Well, there are those people who can be handsome, ugly or whatever, but they just don't do it for us.

Doesn't do it. Just... does not.

On the other hand, this young dude here... Makes me wanna rock the hell out of that cradle:
Does it & does it well. If I wanted to go to jail for getting it done.

Now, Eddie Murphy rode both horses. He was hot as hell at one point. So hot that I got a fever just looking at him:

Sexy & smoking hot.

But Eddie kind of fell off at some point. Had nothing to do with his picking up questionable, er females or taking on goofy roles. (Jerry Lewis, for example, was the king of goofy, but was always sexy. To me. Shut up.) Eddie, though - eh, he didn't do it for me anymore.

Uh... no. No, ma'am. Not hot.

And this gorgeous creature (may he rest in peace) could have gotten me pregnant just by looking at me. Good mercy, he was so damn fine... 
He wasn't even singing at his best that night. But. Damn.

(My girlfriends are as confused as I am. We all agree that chemistry is truly a great mystery. I left then debating why Clinton and Obama are hot and Bush II is not.)

When I was younger, looks (and only looks) did it for me. I got older and got hooked on a sense of humor. Now I'm all about smarts. Okay and humor. One of my girlfriends said that as long as it's male, clean and breathing, she gets excited. I'm pickier than that. So far.

Who knows though? Maybe what we call chemistry really is something more. Maybe it's spiritual. Way back when I was still in love with my first love, I told him the corniest but most genuine thing I'd ever felt. I told him that I thought God created us all out of one spirit and that, in life, when we found the right person, we were just re-connecting. (I was only fourteen and too much "in love.") Well, that first love of mine turned out to be a jerk. He laughed at my young attempt at romantic philosophy then and broke my heart a few years ago. But I still believe.