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Friday, July 30, 2021

Internet: I Have Questions

 ... SO many questions.


Someone needs this shirt


  • Can a YouTuber make a video without begging viewers to "Like and Subscribe"? 
I find this to be so annoying. It's not like YouTube is new. I'm sure that 99.99% of viewers know how to Like a video if they like it and Subscribe if they want to. Personally, depending on how annoyingly placed the begs are, I will downvote a video or just stop watching it and go to the next one in my queue.

  • What is up with the weird narration voices on some of the YouTube channels?
I don't know if this is supposed to be trendy or if the narrator is just trying to make their channel stand out from the pack. 

There was one channel I used to listen to (but stopped) that had a narrator who sounded as if he was a robot trying to sound like a human trying to sound like a robot who was asking a question in every sentence. The speaking cadence was an up and down monotone of irritation that grated on my last good nerve. Too bad because the content was always very interesting.

Another channel was annoying because the narration was - big surprise to me - apparently digital. Yeah. When I complained about the weird pronunciations and odd speech patterns, another commenter told me that I was listening to a computer. Tech is getting good. I really thought I was listening to a person - but a person with an annoying speaking voice.

  • Can we talk about the volume on videos while we're at it?
I don't know why the heck someone would put the time and energy into creating a channel - some of them with a ton of videos - but not get the sound together. I've actually had to get an extension to boost the sound of videos. I sometimes can only hear some of the videos with earphones on. There there are the videos that splice in content without regulating the volume so you're straining to hear one moment and scrambling to Mute the next. 
  • Can we just get to the recipe already???
Okay - I am guilty of this one, but I am getting better. It's so frustrating to Google a recipe, go to a page, then have to hear the life story of someone before they post the actual recipe. And, even worse is when they make it tricky to print the recipe without a ton of photos or their own weird formatting. By the way, I have started making it easy to spot where recipes or reviews start in my posts. See? Getting better.

  • What is with those It the Clown type pop-ups on every page of the internet?
This has long been a pet peeve but it's getting worse day by day. Every time I go to a site to check an article or find that hidden recipe (see above), I'm slapped with one of those stalker pop-up things before I get a glimpse of the page. They pester readers to sign up for newsletters, joining a mailing list, blah-blah-blah-blah-blah. I just feel like yelling at the screen "Can you give me a freaking minute????" 

How do I even know if I want to join your mailing list if I can't see what the heck you are all about first? And why on earth can't the offers be a little less jolting? 

By the way, for all those sites that won't let you price anything or see what they offer without giving an email address? Well, I have a throwaway email just for that. So there.
  • Instagram shops: please be honest and upfront about the products you are selling. Please.
I have found a lot of products to peruse after seeing ads that pop up in my Instagram feed. Not that I always buy the product (I rarely do), but it's cool to see something interesting that I might not have heard of otherwise. My problem is when the ads either straight up lie and misrepresent their product. Don't show me a beautiful wig or whatever only to be selling something that looks like it came from a joke shop. And please start being more upfront with the pricing. I have found at least 10 products or services that sound amazing until I find out that not only can't I afford them but neither can half the upper-middle-class population. Very recently (okay, it was this morning), I saw an ad for a product to replace traditional, stripping shampoos. Man, it sounded so good when the ad echoed my thoughts about the detergents and other insane shampoo ingredients. I almost broke a thumb clicking for more info. Actually, I went to Amazon because I dislike clicking on Instagram ads - in case I hate the product. This amazing hair product should only be advertised to the rich. I don't want to lie on this product but I believe the price I saw was around $50 for 8 ounces. Hah! Begone with you. Get out of here and never come back!

  • Does everyone on Reddit just have to be so snarky?
Okay - first of all, I love Reddit. I just hate some of the users. A lot of them make it their mission in life to out-snark each other. Some of them just can't comment without trying to be cute - or one-up the last comment. Sometimes, they all just get overly playful and go from being fun and cute to annoying.

I really hate when I find a good post that is interesting and useful only to be ruined by stupid comments. I haven't figured out yet how to get past all the long strings of input from attention-seeking people. 

What's wild is that Redditors tend to be really smart and witty and interesting. I don't know how the mean folks managed to take over.

  • Why did Google get rid of Google Plus & why hasn't someone started a similar forum?
I will never and not ever stop being mad about Google Plus going away. I tried some of the other places that Plussers wandered off to. None are good enough. I honestly can't remember off hand the 2 that I tried hard at.

  • Why are there no popular forums for the "mature" among us?
Look, there are plenty of tech people who were born in the '60s and '70s. So why has none of these tech-smart folk come up with a "G Plus" or "Reddit" for people who are mature and act mature? Not all of us are "old at heart". Some of us are very interested in connecting and communicating and sharing - without trying to look and act like we are fit & fab yummy mummies and dishy daddies. Some of us, ahem, are north of 40 and 50+ who love our internet as much as the rest of the users.

Maybe I'm just full of sour grapes, but I can't believe I am the only one who could love a more mature and life-focused version of Facebook. Right now, I have 80-year old relatives trying to keep up with the vain and narcissistic people on these other platforms. Maybe I should be asking for a platform based not on age but on mindset? After all, there are celebrities in their 50s and up who only get attention for looking half their age. That's just sad.

So, yeah, I have so many questions when it comes to the internet. Got any answers? Go ahead, I'll wait. In the meantime, I will be adding to this list...

Peace

--Free