Thursday, April 04, 2013

**Movie REVIEW** Constantine

You all know that I am just a plane trip, an introduction and a few other small miracles away from being Keanu Reeves' main squeeze so, of course, I try to see all of his movies. The other night I watched "Constantine" via Netflix. My overall verdict: Mr. Reeves was wonderful (as usual), but I had to cringe a little at the theology. Not a big deal. Since I was watching purely for entertainment, I enjoyed the film.

I must admit that every time Keanu lit a cigarette (which was a lot), I wanted one so bad I'd wet myself a little. No other man can turn me on by just flicking a lighter. Mercy. The chick playing opposite Keanu is gorgeous. I mean, couldn't they have found a hag for his co-star? Nooooo... they had to go and get a candidate for Prince's "Most Beautiful Girl in The World" video. In between praying that TMWSBM* didn't fall in love with her, I kept thinking that she looked familiar. Not saying that my friends are ugly - because everyone is beautiful in their own special way (heh heh) - but I don't run with anyone this dang good-looking.

When I paid attention to the credits, I saw that the lucky gal who got to work with Mr. Reeves is Rachel Weisz.  Light bulbs went off. She is double lucky because she also played (er, worked) with Keanu on "Chain Reaction." Oh - I loved that film! Ms. Weisz was just as gorgeous in that movie. Damnit, doesn't the woman age or get a pimple or have a bad hair day? Apparently not...

Yeah. See what I mean? Gorgeous. Seems like she is probably also very nice. The nerve.Good thing she is now safely married away to Daniel Craig.

Anyway, about the movie...

Best part was the plot. Interesting and will make you think about random things for a while afterward.  Things like what Heaven and Hell are really like and what angels look like... Might make you nervous if you aren't living well, but maybe not. Sure made me glad I quit smoking, but... I meander.

LOVED Tilda Swinton even though she (it) was kind of bitchy. Okay - Tilda was a tad more than bitchy, but I don't want to say too much.  I don't know what angels look like, but after this, I will forever picture her when I think of Gabriel. Djimon Hounsou creeped me out quite a bit. I have a fear of all things even slightly voodoo-ish (long story that has to do with my step-mother). He was really a good-guy character - in a weird and twisted kind of way. What's really twisted about me is that I thought he was sexy while he was being twisted... I think I need therapy.

I didn't really understand what was going on with the Father Hennessy character. Because I am kind of silly, I was just completely amused that he was a drunk and had Hennessy as his name.

Mostly, I liked this movie because it was entertaining. I enjoyed the various characters and concepts of how good and evil were portrayed. This wasn't a life-altering film, but it was a good watch. Because of this one and "Devil's Advocate," I'm saying prayers for TMWSBM. My baby needs to stay away from Satan for a while.

Yes, I know that this was not the most enlightening review, but, whatever. My blog, my b.s. What's really going to annoy some of you is that I will be doing more film reviews. LOL


*The Man Who Should Be Mine!